WarHams - Narrative Declaration

three two one go excellent sexy is everybody ready for another episode of warhams
by another episode of warhams he means the one the the one from yesterday yeah the yesterday
that's now today so welcome back everybody to warhams a little bit off kilter today because
of the technical issues but but speakers back look at him he has a face everything got fixed
so we're gonna move along to the new episode of warhams no no diddly-doddling and everything else
i would like to introduce all the wonderful people who are here who helped make the show
possible who bust their butts off to make things exist starting with pie brain uh basically
extraordinary speaker d yes hello i am speaker d i am one of the lead writers for if the emperor
had his speech device thing i do that i also do voice acting and i'm ready for the spookiest day
of the year november 1st and next up we have our inquisitorial acolyte reeb van horn played by
erindil and erindil is sitting here commentating on the fact that zorin said no more dilly-dallying
i mean alpha abuse on if the emperor had a text-to-speech device i mean i'm going straight
into the social thing and that's as fast as we got to it and i am zorin the bear i played lauren
the sanctioned psycher you're obviously on the twitch channel listening to all the stuff that
i put up now and next up we have captain zedek leader pretty much uh owner of the debt collector
original rogue trader played by hokey crow yes it is me hokey
i am a sometimes voice actor on if you ever had a text speech device cave on shrike and a couple
background characters uh and i am sorely missing the candy that all those trick-or-treaters took
because now i don't have full-size candy bars anymore but it's okay for the kids for the kids
and the person who's going to be ruining our day today and trying to scare the bejesus out of us
our game master thurston hillman hello they told me i could come here and hurt players so
i'm no one special i just had a license pain on other human beings he has a license for it so
welcome back everybody if you've never been to warhams before for one thank you for showing up
thank you for coming over if you the first time you've ever seen us live which we always go try
our best to go live uh every other saturday usually have a schedule up on twitter at warham
show or you can catch us on discord as well will you choose usually try to put the schedule up
there as well uh pretty much every other saturday
at 1 p.m pst on saturdays or every other saturday and one thing you may be noticing if you're
watching live on twitch we have a nice little overlay thing we have several dice here uh for
those dice you might be wondering well i'm new here what do these dice mean the ones at the
bottom right which are the red ones these red ones are called ruin dice you know because we play on
the system called wrath and glory uh for 140 000 wrath and glory with that tabletop system the
game master has these red dice called ruin dice where he starts out with the red dice and then
with four of them which i have to manually change these things you can you can obviously donate to
give him more of these and he uses these to mess us up because we're fairly powerful characters
like i'm i'm a glass cannon basically for mine and i could blow up space marines technically
but for him he has those dice just to tip the balance more and the enemy's favor to make us
fear for our lives a little bit so that's why he has those but for us and what you players could
do to help us out there's a thing at the at the bottom left you'll see a little bit of a
golden dice here the little kind of eagle like things on them these are called glory die
these dice allow us to basically add more damage to it roll for skills that are probably not really
trained in to increase the chance of success and a whole bunch of other things but we start out
with none we get nothing out of these which is always a sad affair and the dice that you see
below are circle portraits here these are called wrath die these wrath die allow us to spend one
to do a narrative decoration like i really want this thing to happen and then we get a little bit
of a game master to let this happen or i'm doing a thing with a weapon and i really want to convince
the game master to let this happen so my penny to the ferryman is a wrath die additionally we also
use these to re-roll failed uh failed rolls so say for example we did a skill check or something
we failed a bunch of d6 rolls because this is a d6 system not like a d20 or or d10s or do you
100 ones uh these basically four and higher is a success for wrath and glory and so anything below
that is a failure if we need to re-roll those because we've rolled super bad these allow us
those are super useful to us but we only start with two and you chat can always contribute to
warhams to really help us pay for all the art really help us pay for a whole bunch of other
stuff by basically contributing what you can for us to survive so with all of that mr thurston
hillman illustrious game master killer of warhams what do you have for us today we start
with upbeat happy music it's kind of one of those like those those things you would have to do to
expect to see on a on a weekly sitcom where the sun is shining everything's happy except in this
case the debt collector plying through the war we have skipped ahead from the end of our last
session with our intrepid band making their way back to catch a van nord in order to warn her of
actions of one
24th of his name except things on the debt collector are far from great and so our session
begins with this continuing upbeat music as reeb van horn awakes in his chambers reeb can you tell
us what your regular morning routine uh looks like starting with reeb you getting out of bed
what do you normally do
well one of the first thing that reeb would do would of course be uh obviously you know
calisthenics you got you gotta you gotta stretch when you get up in the morning you gotta you gotta
get prepared for a long day's work you know going over all your notes seeing if you can find
something new because we don't get any you know we don't get any cool xenos on the ship with which
you can open up so you spend the morning doing the same thing you do every time while you wait
for uh while you wait for the orders to come through
you
test for your calisthenics in the
well that's gonna suck that's this is why he does it every morning because his agility is not great
it's fine it's gonna be it looks pretty decent to me you can do it you know we believe i press
i press the button so we'll see if it actually is okay okay so so you're you're starting to
to do some stretches you're getting ready in the morning um as as this is going on
something seems off and you're not quite sure what like the
The way our cameras sort of panned on you as you're doing these stretches,
just something seems off.
Where do you go from your morning routine?
What do you do next?
Well, since Reed doesn't really have any other things to do, he...
Good Lord, you're hurting me today.
He would definitely go to his very small collection of little artifacts
that he's taken from some various creatures.
Namely, in this case, the first creature being legs.
Oh, hey, that finally went through, and it was a four and a glory.
When you say legs.
So I believe you have a, what's it, a thigh bone?
It was a femur, because I gave the other one to Pi because he requested it.
But he has this sort of locked up.
And a, you know, a cuboid kind of pedestal made of glass.
Yes, yes, yes.
And you're looking at it.
Something seems really, really off.
Like the angle of it.
Like normally you've seen it, but it takes on a whole different angle.
And I'm assuming with your success on your agility test,
with your glory that you earned from it,
you almost dance across the room as you're doing your calisthenics
to look at the marvel of the femur you claimed from the divine lord of fervor
and one of your friends.
First adventures.
But something seems off.
The glass is reflecting in an odd way.
And you're not quite sure what is so off about how you're staring at it.
But where do you go from there?
Do you take a shower in the morning?
What's next on Reeb's morning?
Well, after the check in on his, you know, valuables to make sure they're still there,
he would definitely just groom himself for the day.
Make sure that he naturally slicks his hair back.
Just.
Just as he normally would.
He does not use gel.
It just does that.
He can't explain it.
Neither of his parents hair did that.
His just does.
He has no way to figure it out.
And he's not exactly able to perform a vivisection on himself.
So, you know, kind of hard to tell.
And so with this slicking back of your hair,
you realize that the mirror you have in your lavatory room,
you're only seeing just your your head.
Like your head is barely creeping up off of the bottom of the mirror.
But you slick it back and your hair does exactly what it normally does.
Going into its perfect array behind you.
What are you doing next?
I'm seeing that multiple things are going wrong.
Reeve is now going to attempt to determine what's happening because that's obviously not normal.
And the first thing he's going to do is take his scalpel and jab himself in the shoulder with it.
OK, OK, yeah, yeah, there there is the sweet kiss of.
Pain and with the sweet kiss of pain, there is also the sweet, sweet kiss of reality.
As you realize that you've been walking on the ceiling since waking up.
And then you tumble down to the floor of your room, crashing underneath your mirror.
But you thought he was going to pinch himself awake.
No, this is long since past pinching.
It's like, oh, something's really wrong now.
And we cut we cut we cut away from from this scene of Reeve.
After.
After stabbing himself, realizing he's been walking on the ceiling to to Lorne, to Lorne's room.
Now, Lorne.
You you don't get the luxury of telling me how you wake up because you wake up to the feeling of something strangling you in your bed.
You see no figures around you, but there's this tension around your neck.
It's like grabbing at my neck.
You go to grab at your neck, but what you find out is that there's no hands or anything there.
Instead, it's like your beard has has just coiled around your neck.
Now, why would you do such a thing?
I started talking at my beard.
Yeah, sure.
Do you want to?
I don't know.
Give me a give me a strength test.
Oh, cool.
That's going to go well.
The one thing I like.
What's my strength?
One.
One.
Yes.
One.
Yes.
I know it.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
I clicked it too fast.
Can I spend six glory to fight my beard?
No, I'm throwing the boot down.
No.
OK, that's one vote of no other party.
I.
I need to know what it's funny.
Yeah, go for it.
I don't care.
OK, Hulky.
Watch it.
It's telling something's telling me I shouldn't let you do this, but whatever.
Sure.
I'm sure it's fine.
I'm sure.
It's fine.
OK, 66.
I try to do bonus time.
Click the thing.
I don't know.
Roll Tony's being weird today, I guess.
It's it's a Sunday.
Our six.
We'll do it that way.
Yeah, I'll do this and then click that in the last one.
So I got one, two, three.
Wow.
I actually got.
Pretty good.
One, two, three, four, five, six successes.
I got a six.
Yeah.
So you like you managed to rip your animate beard away from holding strands of it in place
as it's like sneaking around.
Like, did I like throw it on the ground?
It's like at me.
I assume more that like it's in your hands and your hands are just outstretched like
two feet away from.
I see.
I see.
I see.
I'm so much.
Why do you betray me?
I must not.
We were here together.
Always.
I grew you since you were just a stubble.
And you just hear this, this moaning in the background and then it stops and your beard
drops down to an animacy.
It's OK.
It's OK.
I forgive you.
I forgive you.
I cry in a corner.
And as you are crying in the corner, we we shift to our to our next scene.
Pie Brain, what drink what drink are you ordering from the bar?
Well, it's part of my early morning routine.
I must, of course, clean out my insides with a delicious boiled, scalding hot chlorinated water.
So as you purchase or you order this chlorinated water as as you hear this request of what will you be drinking, sir?
From Operator 34R, who's sitting at the bar across from you.
This scatarius bartender who quickly puts together your request to drink and passes it to you.
Speaker, you're my guy.
Loud all of a sudden.
You want to quickly fix it?
Yes.
Very good.
I will take my drink.
I don't have to pay this man anything, right?
Pie is not a man with very many worldly possessions.
I mean, like, are you going to to make some offer to him?
Are you going to make a statement or are you just kind of looking around to like for something with which to pay?
What do I owe you, good sir, B-A-R-3-R-34-R?
Do not worry, your credit's fine, Mr. Pie.
Orders from the house.
That is good, 34R.
You know, my power sword always stops working on me and I don't understand.
I've only broken it once.
I've only broken it...
I've never broken it.
Okay.
Perhaps, and he's like...
The bartender's still like, cleaning this glass in one of his mechanical hands.
Perhaps it is the company you are keeping.
Hmm.
Yes, but you know what they say about...
Rogue traders...
Can't leave with them,
Can't kill them.
Very good, sir.
Very good.
good what do you think of the times well the times wait hold on a second three four are
you don't work on the debt collector i do now i opened a bar here i'm expanding
and he leans forward towards you times are great pie times could be greater times could be a whole
lot greater but what do i need to do to make the times great
and as you say that you you come off of your deactivation cycle in your quarters
looking around to to your regular room uh
and this is where all three of you kind of come together having been living through scenes like
this for the past several weeks as the debt collector has been stuck in a warp storm
that ceaselessly follows the vessel since your departure from shady rock
we we kind of jump forward to a short meeting of the three of you uh pie brain reeb and lorne
inside of reeb's quarters
as you are
discussing the last two weeks of terrible travel
reeb's uh definitely you know he's still got like one shoulder out of his uniform and you can
probably kind of see the multiple scalpel stabs into his shoulder by this point probably from
the week of constantly waking himself up that way well this is very irritating
by the messiah reeb
i say looking at all of his scalpel wounds
what happened to lorne's beard
but no it's just it was you know
copernicus decided to try to kill me tonight
again hey yeah yeah again i mean it normally is very tame but it's
sometimes it just gets a little you know antsy or whatever
i just take out my radium pistol i just start shooting it in the air
time's up
I'm trying to lower his arm
Stop firing, discharging a weapon in my room you nitwit
3 4 R is coming he's giving me chlorinated water i don't have to pay
for it and he wants me to make for times.
what do you mean what do you mean he's he's already been on the ship
what
yeah yeah but he's here?
i'm the ship. he? he life you? I'm geekeduemitch!
I think he's been here
I mean I've seen someone giving drinks around
out of his chest so
that's what I was drinking last night
and came to my room
and I point to the
janitorial closet
oh my gosh
he knows where the closet
is
he'll be anywhere
that's your worry
oh fuck
can I
roll a medicaid on
Lauren's newly
beardless face
no I still have a beard
yeah the beard is just not animate trying to kill him
anymore
I thought he ripped it off with his you know
six
I assume it like probably
thinned slightly
there's some clumps missing
where is that dick
is that dick been taking drinks
from 3-4-R
presumably
for the last two weeks
Captain Zedek has been conspicuously
absent solely on the bridge
as this warp storm shows
no signs of abating
hey you know what
Captain Zedek has been conspicuously missing
ever since we went to the warp thing
like a voice in my head just told me
we should go find him
now right it's time we threatened another mutiny
he's a manager or something I think
we should complain to him
about beards killing people let's go
ok
I believe you two would be best suited for that test
I need to ensure that no one else on the ship
who may be or may not be in critical condition
is suffering unduly from the storm
that's a good idea
Reeb I grab him by the collar
by the way
don't drink the water
and then I drop him
I don't drink water you know
well you should it is good for you
I get water in different ways
do you photosynthesize
that's
I'll explain that to you later
go check on the captain
I'm going to go check on our medbay
I never knew that Reeb was a bio freak
and then we just start going
I'm not
so yeah
the two of you
make your way towards the
the stratagem where
Captain Zedek is
has been set up
you come to the stratagem
as the crew are all like bleary eyed
working at their station
several servitors are plugged in
some are moving around
you see two that walk
by you at the entrance
one is dubbed Sirius Ainsla
and the other is Ian Cable
and they just saunter past you
right now
you getting the bag there speaker
I thought I was muted
I'm going to fuck with you
break it up
your brain is simply nervous
he's just panicking
he's got himself a bag of microchips
I can't even walk in
he's just eating
holy shit
I'm so sorry
you have to understand
we record this on audacity as well
to get the audio level
if Alpha ever has to get this audio
he has to deal with your chip bagging shit
you have to filter all that out
I've been getting myself in coughing
because I got like a lot of phlegm
for some reason
so I'm just telling him like
sorry Alpha
sorry
it's like
when I do
I have to like go to my mixer
like turn my shit down
or press the mute button
it's like
it's a fuck
god damn it people
make your life hard
I'm so sorry
I was hoping to add to the horror ambiance
you can continue
times are hard
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
time's a rush
that's right
this is an ASMR stream now
no
no
deny
alright
we're running up to Captain Zedek
who has a bag of fucking chips
uh yeah
yeah yeah
so you um
you make your way
towards the strategium
and you find like
Captain
Captain Zedek
is there
uh sitting on his throne
and you
you all um
or both the two of you
make your way
and
enter
um
yeah that's good
Lieutenant Ransom
is there as well
uh so
what do you do
as you uh
as you both
enter the strategium
Zedek
where are you
and I take out my sword
I'm just kind of
waving it around
not at anyone in particular
I just
I enter rooms like this
all the time
at this point
the security guards know
just not to get close to me
they just duck
anyone listening to the plot case
ain't gonna fucking understand
this
did you literally
just fucking
censor bar
re
just put a black bar
over him
cause he left
I censor bar re
and put a bag of chips
coming out of
coming out of
my brain
and
in the shoddiest
jobs I could do
yes
listen it's alright
he couldn't
he couldn't
predict the fact that
not only would I not be here
but that pie would have chips
right
that's true
bag of chips
doesn't even eat
he's just like
he's like academically
curious about them
he's just rustling the bag
like a jackal
as he's walking
there's just this crunch
he put them in his shoes
for maximum crunch
and so
so yeah
lieutenant ransom is behind
um
captain zedek
you are sitting on your
command throne
uh
you see pie brain
come in
waving around
his sword
and uh
lorne is behind
oh dear
not again
I
wave off
the accountant primus
who I'm talking to
about
the holiday bonuses
to our
employees here
on the deck collector
and I tell him
to come back later
I'm sure
they won't be happy
to hear that
and he turns
and walks away
look we can
we can give the bonuses
but we have to ration
the corpse starch
more effectively
cut
cut their food
but increase the pay
okay
gentlemen
how may I help you
I'm a bit busy right now
I will not cut this food
and I throw that
piece of chip
on the ground
I just bought this
now listen here
Zedek
the ship has got
ghosts
or something
ghosts
yes
run that by me
one more time
I don't think
I don't think I heard you
you said there was a ghost
on board
that is correct
I will now relay
all of the objective
evidence
late
last
night
mm-hmm
okay
okay
okay
okay
okay
mm-hmm
waiting
uh-huh
uh-huh
enticing
enticing
just
anything
so
uh-huh
I I've waved my hand
in front of
Ray's
face
shut down
hey
hey
hey
I look at
I drag his face to mine
I see like a blue screen
in his eyes
just
he just shut down
I gotta
hold on
hold on
please tell me
you're still there
okay
I I rip open
open up his chest cavity
and I start
you know
reinstalling windows
just
trying to just
boot him back up
on windows 50
it's like a dial-up sound
like
speaker
speaker
hey there dude
okay
well
otherwise
um
as my friend was
trying to say
that uh
unfortunately
um
I was almost killed
by Pachonikis
last night
and uh
apparently
uh
Piebrain
had a bit of a rundown
with um
with some
horrible
thing
I suppose
I guess he
started having hallucinations
and uh
last we passed by Ray
his shoulder was stabbed
stabbed rapidly
I don't know what
stabbed him there
but things
weird things are happening
on the ship
Captain Zedek
and we want to know
what you can do about it
well first
I have several questions
of my own about
why
who's
Pachonikis
I don't know
this person
and there's plenty
of weird things
on the ship
going on as is
I'm certain
that it's just
the
it's just the walls
creaking as they do
the ship is kind of old
oh
what it looks like
oh
he's still rebooting
it's old
well
don't
don't think I haven't
been having any problems
either Captain
the lower decks
are just
so difficult
to access
now that the elevators
are on the fritz
oh
I thought I had
fixed that one
I must have been
some other minor problem
that I drunkenly
attempted to fix
the crew
stopped using
some of the service
shafts too
because they've
reported screaming
from them
more screaming
than usual
I know they can be
kind of cramped
but
screaming that isn't
coming from the crew
sir
ah
that
that is
troubling then
well do we
have any leads
on where this is
coming from
I know that the ship
can be
temperamental at times
but
surely it's something
explainable
and plausible
well
I wouldn't be the one
to answer that sir
as you're aware
there's only one
person knowledgeable
on warp travel
on board this vessel
no
no no no
I'm certain
there's gotta be
somebody else on board
who
who knows the ins and outs
of traveling through
the nightmare realms
of the imperialists
of the imperialists
surely we don't
we don't have to
talk to
I mean I know how to
do it in my dreams
but
sir you've been
putting off
speaking to her
long enough
I get it in real
close to ransom
come on
we don't really
have to talk to her
I don't want to
I don't want to
introduce her to
everybody
sir
uh
fine
okay
we'll
we'll talk to
the navigator
sir
we
we have a navigator
yes
we
we happen to have
a navigator
here on the debt collector
I just don't mention
them often
because
well
they can be a bit
temperamental
like the ship
which kind of tracks
navigator
Gibran
has a
flawless
track record
sir
I
I know she does
but
it's almost
I'm sorry
Lord
did you
do you
do you have
something to say
that now
I thought I did
but I
I kind of like
do you have a dolly
you have a dolly
for a
pie brain here
yes
I'll
I'll
I'll handle this
myself
let me go
all right
fetch the loader
servitors
we'll just
bring you along
with us
all right
I've got you
here
let me just
drag you along
like this
just the grinding
of metal
he's just
stiff as a bird
that's now
just basically
just going through
speaker
speaker
boom
hello
yes
oh no
your
your voxing
got ruined
oh good
give me a moment
oh my gosh
it seems
your
your connections
to your
to your throats
and whatnot
is
is horribly
mangled
I'll fix it
throat
don't worry
don't worry
I'll fix it
I'll fix it
oh my god
can it be a little
bit louder
should I stop
pushing him
on this dolly
please
stop every step
his pain
oh dear
uh yes
just stop moving him
I'm sure he's fine
you have to adjust
the amplitude
on your vox unit
we can't really
hear you that well
oh goodness
give me a moment
oh my god
I'm sorry
the chat
chat just gave
a really good message
pie it's an
xbox live party
chat mode
let's go
we're so
yeah now
we're in a world
of trial and error
world of
trial and error
why
oh god
out of us
two days
it was
it was working
perfectly
from like an hour
after we canceled
to like
now
and then
now
it just
explodes again
it's like
fucking
why does this
happen
I can't turn up
the fucking
volume
it's on his
end
he's rebooting
it failed to
install the audio
driver
it's just
doing what it
normally does
maybe we should
take him
to
to
to
to
to
to
to
work on
it's
it's
fucking
just
nah
it's
a
reed
do you know
how to work
on machines
because
I thought
we were more
of the
the flesh
type of
doctor
he's not here
to stay
one way
or the other
so like
you know
oh
yeah
he was
censored
he was
kind of
in the
med bay
you're taking
him there
anyway
so
yeah
let's take
him to
reed
to investigate
trunk
trunk
trunk
how you
feeling there
buddy
well
you tell
me
I got the
I have to
find a way
to
all right
now talk
now talk
to me
buddy
talk to
me
buddy
okay
I will
talk to
you
I'm going
to sit
by my
audacity
which is
still recording
wait
I've
done it
give
give me like
two minutes
I just
reconnected
okay
okay
we're gonna
take a break
we're gonna
take a quick
break
as we figure
this shit
out
okay
technically
difficult
okay
everyone's
friends
fixed it
hooray
hooray
I think
reed
has
reactivated
my brain
hello
I have
recovered
back
from
crying
sabotage
god
god
it seems
that uh
your things
are working
now
good
wait a
second
this isn't
crying
sabotage
captain
did you
sabotage
my brain
so you
wouldn't have
to go see
the navigator
no of
course not
of course
I didn't
my knowledge
of tech
is incredibly
unsubstantiated
and I don't
know how to
fix him
nor break
him
well I mean
I do
know how to
break him
I almost
shocked him
to death
but that's
beside the
point
that was
unintentional
captain
all I did
was turn
him off
and on
again
that's all
you have
to do
I reinstalled
windows 50
no don't
install that
it's malware
oh
well
I think
you should
all go to
the navigator
mistress
is waiting
for you
sir
I've let
her know
you and
your companions
will be
arriving soon
thank you
thank you
ransom
excuse me
I'm gonna
go to a
routine
patrol
lower decks
I'll be
back later
hello ransom
all right
goodbye ransom
well that's
I mean
she should be
so bad
I'm captain
I'm sure
she's a nice
lady
just don't
try anything
weird like
you did
earlier
please purchase
zedekit
zedekit
your ultimate
manual
for etiquette
oh
I didn't
know that
oh I'm
so happy
oh wait
no I'm sad
again we have
to talk to her
okay let's
go to the
lower decks
GM
uh
yeah
question
actually
yes
how are
the uh
occupants
of the
medbay
of which
there should
be
I think
three
name
one being
of course
the the
tech priest
that we
continue to
basically have
like sitting
in a can
uh
yes
grandma
and grandpa
uh
grandpa
uh
grandpa and
grandma are
no longer
on the ship
now your
memories of
shady rock
are somewhat
somewhat fuzzy
as you try
to remember
the specifics
though you
you know
that um
inquisitor lord
melchior is
is safe
and in fact
left the ship
on board
an inquisitorial
vessel
but beyond
that
oh
can't quite
figure out
exactly
what happened
yeah I bet
he did leave
on an inquisitorial
vessel you
big old
all right
then well
hi friend
stab you
all right
well if that's
all I have to
worry about
then yeah I guess
reeb's gonna
go along with
at this point
and and he will
point out
windows 50 is
not what you
install in a
tech priest
you need to
install linux
linux 2
oh the
ancient one
I see
uh come
here speaker
or come
here brain
come here
grab
brains
get you
fixed
gotta get
you fixed
okay I
will by the
way I noticed
you're trying
to fix a tech
priest would
you like some
help with that
yes I would
like some help
with that
except
um
as you
make your
way
I physically
can't do it
because I have
a zoo
I have like
a two
maybe
we're moving
forward
as Zedek
leads the way
you start to
find yourself
in a part of
the ship
that's actually
not shitty
like suddenly
there's
arches
wow
is this
where the
budget went
curtains
and
and like
suddenly the
ground here
is covered
in in
pillows
and blankets
and there's
food trays
all set
around
and you
you continue
walking through
and there's
people who are
lying down
clearly members
of the
navigator
staff
be they
specific
navigator
house
arms men
or just
navigators
in training
who are
who are
resting
and you're
you're
continuing
to to make
your way
through this
lavish airing
how do all
of you react
to seeing
that
very different
from the rest
of the ship
ah
Zedek
um
the fuck
where all
the money
go
let us
just say
i've gone
to pains
to make
sure our
navigator
is as
comfy as
she possibly
can be
i am
servitor
imperious
and this
is diceous
we are
both here
to
provide
whatever
you require
during your
time in
the house
gibbon
navigatorial
section
of this
vessel
would you
like some
appetizers
and the
servitor
raises up
this platter
with all
of these
fine little
pieces of
meat or
different um
like baked
goods on
them
i don't
know
i i'm
fine today
i'm on a
strict uh
calorie limited
diet
where is
servitor
maximus
i thought
he was
supposed to
be serving
the aperitifs
no
the only
ones we
have on
are
shimaloa
red wolf
and kroger
and jay
boom
they are
providing the
droning of
warding and
like in the
background you
hear this
as these
servitors are
just like
chanting in
the background
i just
nod my
head i
love this
song
it's a
braille banger
yeah
captain
captain
captain
zedek
and this
this meek
woman
very old
and frail
approaches
a metal
plate covering
her forehead
well dark
gray hair
runs down
her her
arms are
somewhat crossed
under her
chest uh
both hidden
under folds
of gray
great immense
clothing
captain
uh
hello
navigator
gibrain
app
are you
here to
let me
know that
it's finally
over that
the vessel
can't take
any more
and our
journey is
finally over
no
navigator i
am not
here to
tell you
that our
ship has
inevitably
spiraled
towards
oblivion
as you
have hoped
many times
before
i have
come instead
to beseech
your help
and figuring
out why a
hellstorm is
following the
ship almost
constantly
oh
yes
the warp
storm we've
entered
it's
it's
following us
we are at
the center
of it
no matter
where we
move it
is on us
no matter
how we try
to escape
it remains
with us
i think
i think
that this
will be
our final
journey
no
i'd prefer
it not
be
i sort
of lean
over reem
it's like
she's
always like
this just
humor her
yes i'm
sure it
will be
the final
journey the
final flight
of the debt
collector i'm
certain you
told my
father that
many times
before
but alas
i think
we'll hedge
our bets
that it
won't be
so do
you have
any idea
of how
we can
alleviate
the situation
or maybe
leave this
warp storm
so we
don't die
in a
most horrible
or potentially
undie in a
most horrible
fashion over
and over
again lost
to the tides
of the warp
like i'm
sure you
have been
avidly hoping
for forever
to be consumed
by the entities
within the
great
empyrean
that would
be our
fate
all of us
will be
devoured
and that
will be
the end
of our
existence
it will
be
oblivion
of endless
tortures
but but
i i
believe
that whatever
this storm
is following
us
there is
something on
this ship
causing it
some some
focal
item
perhaps a
ritual of
some kind
being enacted
but who
would want
to enact
a ritual
on this
ship
yeah yeah
who would
want to do
that
i don't
know
none of us
know
travel
i do not
travel to
those lower
decks i stay
here in the
modest
guild housing
we have
fine i
i click this
in advance
to do it
do the thing
i i do
science science
two minutes
ago i am
a sense
the psychic
things in the
wind and in
the air
see if i
sense any
psychic power
thingies
this place
this place
has some
um
like some
some various
like psychic
powers going
on here
specifically
from the
astropaths and
whatnot
i'm sorry
from from
the astropath
that's on
the other
portion of
the ship
um you do
detect like
you're getting
some kind of
emanations from
the lower
decks but
nothing
nothing is
jumping out
at you
um as
as being
off whatever
is going
on it
it's something
that's
obfuscated
i tell you
it's three
four r
he's handing
out dream
water to
people
dream water
need to
talk to
someone who
knows what's
going on
this ship
that's why
i
came to
you
i see
outside the
ship
you and
she points
this
cronely finger
at you
you captain
zedek should
know what
is going
on on your
ship
but you
don't
you're too
busy having
birthday cakes
every time
we exit
the warp
yeah what
is that
about
zedek
it's just
a tradition
that we
carried over
from my
father to
celebrate not
dying in
some catastrophic
way it just
happens to be
dwindling
supplies
be better
than tradition
and employ
the change
you want
zedek
you listen
here i will
downgrade your
broom closet
to a supply
closet
i am already
in a supply
closet they're
both the same
thing
our
anger is
polluting this
place and
though it
would hasten
our eventual
demise i
i i i
weary of
this conversation
captain
you're
you will have
to find
the cause
the focal
point of
this warp
storm
to stop
whatever it
is that
is
the walls
begin wailing
again
okay
all right
i i
guess we
are done
here i'm
going to
walk up to
the navigator
i'm gonna
put a hand
on her
shoulder
and pat
her and
do not
worry
pathetic
lady
one day
your flesh
will weaken
and fade
and you
will die
i hope it
is soon
and i give
her a thumbs
up
what
she just
kind of like
nods
resignedly
like
his face is
kind of
twitching
between
disgust
and confusion
i hope you
expired
your earliest
convenience
yeah pretty
much
yeah
could you
tell us
have you been
hearing any
sort of
wooing
through the
the walls
at all
from in here
or has it
been mostly
around us
wailing from
within the
ship
it intensifies
i think
i think it
will swallow
us entire
into the
warp
whatever is
trying to
break out
of this
vessel
break
out
right
well
i'm
you mean
to say
that there's
something
that got
in
that's trying
to fight
its way
back
out
yes
you'll have
to find
it
captain
zedek
or we'll
all die
here
i bet
camu
did this
just because
she's from
forge world
crya
doesn't mean
she let a
warp entity
into the
ship brain
i mean we
could just
space her
to be sure
no because
she keeps
the ship
sort of
in order
even though
she complains
to me all
day about
things i
haven't yet
fixed
yeah i
know always
complaining
oh camu
all right
let's go
not all
die or
something
we shouldn't
have a list
of people
who do
that to
you do
you do
anything
on the
ship
i try
to and
then we
go and
do things
and then we
celebrate
technical
rebirth days
out of the
war
what do
you do
i run
the ship
okay
what is
your day
to day
do you
get up
eat birthday
cake
celebrate
birthday
and then go
to sleep
like what
the fuck
do you
do
lauren if
you read
the autobiographical
section of
zetakit you
would understand
what my
day-to-day
duties are
canonically
and that's
what everybody
needs to
know and
not what
i actually
do
yeah
come on
lauren
every day
he holds
a waterfall
over his
head in
a band
basket
woven by
the by
the many
children
whose
whose
lives
they
celebrate
him
in the
in the
lower
decks
and there's
fairies
and there's
rainbows
and he
gets all
the money
and the
people in
the world
come say
hello to
him and
it's great
come on
i have an
existential
crisis
i hold
my head
hanging
how
caught
what
was i
brought
into
i just
leave
yeah
four of
you make
your way
out of
the the
the luxury
of the
navigator's
portion of
the vessel
and into
the like
dreary
doldrums
of of
the mid
mid lower
decks
captain
i'm not
one to
do this
but
i'm such
a downcast
person
does

not
cause
trouble
in the
past
well
let's
leave it
at this
she
depresses
me
and
my
head
cannon
is that
that
depression
is sucked
and seeped
through the
walls of
the ship
which is
why it's
in a
total
state of
disrep
are you
blaming the
problems of
the ship
on your
navigator
and not
your
captain
you
fuck
uh
we're gonna
take
a
take
a
moment
and just
like
slow his
walk
to be
next to
zedek
captain
i hate
to break
it to you
but if
you think
the problem
is a member
of your
crew
you should
replace
them
please
pardon
me
but
many
issues
can be
handled
if you
merely
employ
the correct
people
to do
it
we do
not
need
it
i can
replace
them
anytime
i want
and i
just start
walking
again
and just
ignore
the rest
of the
question
i agree
if we
were trying
to replace
the problems
we wouldn't
have a
captain
zedek
anymore
let's
go
pie
pie
is going
to ask
one last
question
he's going
to raise
his hand
and wait
for zedek
to call
on him
i have
i have
a question
yes
pie
what
does
cake
taste
like
we all
i stand
there sad
that would
that would
be where
the commercial
break
would start
you know
what brain
you
cake
tastes like
the last
sunset
you see
on your
home world
before departing
into the
unknown
horrors
of space
knowing
that the
best days
have set
behind you
and that
only
nightmare
awaits
on that
dark
horizon
jeez
that's
depressing
and that's
why i don't
talk to the
navigator
i don't
need
reinforcement
all right
so where
where are
you for
you you
know there's
something wrong
on the ship
uh you you
might need
to get a
lay of the
land where
are you uh
for going
to go
now
that's a
good question
i had to
guess i
would say
that three
four is
responsible
for everything
and we
need to
talk to
him
i suppose
we could
go down
to the
lido deck
or rather
go up
to the
lido deck
and see
if he's
managed to
stay on
the ship
long enough
wait wait
you flip
off
is it
up or
down on
your ship
let me
check my
death gauge
that it's
clearly
functioning
and not
in disrepair
i will also
point out
that despite
some of you
seeing three
four are
on the
ship
it's not
like just
katari has
actually opened
a bar
yet uh
that like
you can go
to you
you don't
have like
any lay
of the
land
where he
set up
shock
there's
two places
he could
be but
i'm not
keen on
going to
both of
them right
now since
those decks
are infested
by people
i don't
talk to
because they
don't like
me
why don't
they like
you in
syndicate
it says
everyone likes
you
yeah
never meet
your hero
brain
never meet
your hero
oftentimes
when people
meet their
heroes they
bring many
complaints and
sharp implements
and you have
to escape
down one of
the many
shafts in
the ship
to not
get shivved
wow
that sounds
exciting
let's go
do that
you're gonna
go to the
lower decks
then yes
i i
bravely
will head
there and
anyone who
wants to
come alongside
we can
come as
well i
mean
i guess we
gotta do
it
again
and
we got
off we
go
okay
yeah uh
you you
make it
are you like
trying to
go to any
region in
particular in
the lower
decks uh
do you have
any skill
checks you'd
like to
to make
in order to
see what
your knowledge
is on the
lay of the
land in
the lower
decks
oh oh
i have
one i
am going
to before
i do
anything
yeah check
with the
manifest reports
and see where
all the
chlorinated
water is
going and
if there's
been any
recent spikes
in where
this chlorinated
water is
going we
will know
that he
has all
the good
shit
as brain
does that
i'll also
check to
see where
all we
where we
all the
people we've
picked up so
far i want
to see where
we put them
and investigate
that because
if something
got in
they would
be the
we've got
possibly
slip with
them so
i
will check
for that
i mean the
biggest thing
that you know
is that
you have
the rattlings
in the lower
decks which
have set up
in the sort
of like
rattling
quarter of
the lower
decks where
they are
undergoing
rigorous
training from
belba creep
foot you
also know
that you've
taken on a
variety of
cargo and
several cargo
actually that
would be a
show on my
good maybe
go find
belba
yes yes
she is
the chef
of security
it wouldn't
be hard
just flip over
the nearest
damned cardboard
box and i'm
sure you'll
find her
hold on
i've tried
that she's
not usually
under them
check that
one
it's a
flip over
in the nearest
cardboard box
well done
this is
fucking
stupid
you should
follow me
to my
quarters
we have
to have a
talk
belba if i
may
sooner or
later the
cardboard box
shirk is going
to run thin
you may want
to try hiding
under something
else i'm
sure there's
plenty of
hollow barrels
around you
could try
i've also
bought some
real boxes
made of
wood
you are a
genius
let's go to
my quarters
we have to
talk about
the state of
your ship
captain
please don't
say go to
my quarters
and that
was
all right
well let's
go captain
we have
business to
discuss with
our chef of
security
yeah so
so with
that belba
creepfoot
leads you
along the
the rattling
commando
who you
have previously
encountered on
far them
for and
has now
become part
of your
your intrepid
crew in
fact was
promoted to
chef of
security
um you
make your
way into
the lower
decks into
the rattling
quarter where
belba brings
you to her
her quarters
which are a
um like
small set of
quarters filled
with all sorts
of industrial
equipment from
like machinist
uh work
tables to
like a
reciprocating
saw um
there's sort
of like this
corrugated steel
back walling
on which is
this immense
conspiracy
board um
there's there's
pictures all
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
over and
then you know
zenos
question mark
and several
things about
um like
different uh
different reports
on the debt
collector
specifically with
maintenance reports
that have been
filed by gamu
versus maintenance
reports that have
been filed by
pi brain
there seems to
be like
twine that
connects several
things in this
overarching spider
web
and then
and in the
middle of it
all this this
web of
terrifying
uh
conspiratorial
data at the
center of it
is a picture
of captain
zetic
though the
picture is
a somewhat
risque picture
of the good
captain as
he sits
wearing only
his jacket
holding on
to the the
steering wheel
at the bridge
of the vessel
and nothing
else and
there's
nothing else
i don't
remember posing
for that
um
is this
etiquette
i don't
have to man
okay
here you go
captain
in all fairness
if we count
if we catalog
the amount of
things you would
not remember
it would likely
be as long
as one of
gamu's listings
all right
that's going
off the screen
now good luck
well so much
good job
that
terrific
thank god
welcome
to a stupor
belba belba
like saunters
in and then
hops hops
up on the
the wooden
crate
belba
where where
did you get
that
i trade
for it
it was the
only art of
you i could
find on this
ship
you want to
switch the
scene thing
you
you couldn't
have just
asked for a
camera capture
couldn't have
just
i i don't
have
i didn't
captain
zedek drinks
again from
his flask
we have
more important
things to discuss
than captain
zedek's
dashing form
we must
instead discuss
why
everyone is
getting dream
water
incontinence
is not a
side effect
of the
war
if you have
that that's
an issue
you need to
discuss with
me
we're not
on a
continent
idiot
we're on
a spaceship
i mainly
moonbeam
the room
okay give
me a second
test
i roll
athletics
to dodge
i roll
athletics
to dodge
i roll
athletics
to dodge
i roll
i roll
i roll
i roll
i roll
i i'm okay
with that nine
i'm just going
to assume
you tear
right through
that picture
of captain
zedek
it burns
and falls
i got it
i got it
i got it
everybody
he's dead
thank you
lauren
you're welcome
now right
there's a lot
going on
on this ship
that you need
to be aware
of
especially
you captain
tell me
tell me
everything
you know
well you've
been
gallivanting
around
several groups
have formed
in the lower
decks
they're mostly
divided into
three factions
now down
here
oh not
more cults
captain
i thought you
tried to crack
down on the
the cult of
personality
that followed
you around
i did
we got rid
of most of
them i thought
it was okay
that they started
telling me how
cool i was
and then they
started making
these weird
effigies
and then they
started wearing
weird facsimiles
of my face
and
captain
captain
she said that
the different
excuse me
that's right
these are
these are cults
all formed
of different
different sections
of the ship
the first one
and she like
turns around
and steps to the
edge of the
like wooden crate
she's on
and points
with uh
with her tiny
short sword
tapping it on
the the
like still like
searing molten
wreckage
just in a picture
um
that produces
this image
of what clearly
looks to be
some kind of
gas mask
with flames
coming out
of the vents
in the front
that first one's
the prometheum
offers
they've
they've set up
shop all along
the lower decks
they're a
neurally
degenerate cult
they're seeking
something that
they refer to
as a
batshit
consciousness
the
the
all right
very good
and um
what are they
doing
well
near as i can tell
there are nihilistic
death cults
down here
you know
because they all
have prometheum
yes
i that's a side
effect of
prometheum
along with a
scorched lung
and uh
and the other
the other groups
well
after
elba pauses
oh
my brain
yeah
i think i saw
i think i saw
b4r out in the
hallway
oh my god
i don't even
open the door
i just smash
through it
okay you you
rush it
elba looks around
the next group
they've
that's set up
they call themselves
gamu's
debuggers
oh
cripes
i push a door
i push a box
in front of the
newly imprinted
door
which is just
like
me
the upper
silhouette
of the
power
sword
through the
wall
this is a
group of
tech-focused
lower-deck
crews
they've
shown some
aptitude
with technology
earned the
graces
of gamu
at nearest
i can tell
she's conscripted
low-level
menials
into fixing
the ship
since um
since she
can't trust
the captain
to get it
done
yes
set again
bit wins
again
i love
i love how
you should
be angry
but you're like
fuck yes
i'm making
them work
hard
no
captain
i'm afraid
i'm afraid
i must
i must
uh
alert you
to the fact
that uh
this is due
to your
incompetence
it's not
incompetence
if it's
strategic
incompetence
gamu is
going to
gamu has
uh
formed a
smaller
cult of
personality
uh
and does
wait actually
this begs
the question
how did
she contact
them
she's been
finding out
when people
fix things
and then
recruiting
them
and she
hasn't come
to me
real fixer
uppers
and going
like you
can't
you're with
me now
and then
just making
an army
to eventually
overthrow
zedek
going
these will
fix you
next
and it's
just
just
annihilating
zedek
so you
you have
an army
being built
right under
your nose
zedek
well the
real army
might be
the third
faction
that's
come to
prominence
go on
at this
point i
assume
pie brain
bursts back
in
i just
kind of
casually
stepped
through
the precise
imprint i
left
he ran
away
there's a
box in
front of
you
yeah
i trip
over the
box
boom
boom

I'm
kind of
obsessed with
the concept
of cooking
and acquiring
meat
after the
cookout
they now
scrounge the
ship for
any and all
sources of
meat they
can find
that's
concerning
um
they haven't
shown any
um
unsavory
tendencies
you were
there for
them when
we were
back on
your home
yes
no
okay good
they refute
all statements
of being
called rabbit
cannibals
after all
they precisely
debone render
marinate spice
their acquired
meats which
is something
cannibals would
never do
um yes
certainly
so it makes
a lot of
sense
do they or
do they not
eat
natural
corpse
starch
or
de-starched
do they
they're creating
a new food
market on
the lower
levels
they're trying
to cut your
corpse starch
out of the
out of the
equation
mother
captain it
seems like
you're being
ousted
out of the
lower decks
nobody
capitalizes
on my
corpse starch
microeconomy
all right
but there's
another group
that's come
they're called
especially among
my rattling
kin
they're called
the survey
for vorum
i don't know
much about
them only
their name
but
i think
they're responsible
for what's
going on
they're
more like
what reeb
was saying
one of those
stranger
cults
um
are they
some kind
of
warp
worshiping
are they
heretics
i don't
know
they're very
secretive
hmm
do you
know their
secrets
i think
i know
i think i
know how
you can get
in touch
with them
they're trying
to court a
group of
people
we see
seven
we have
more
stowaways
yeah
this is a
recent group
they came
on one of
the latest
supply runs
they've been
living out
of cargo bay
seven since
they came
on board
well
if we have
stowaways
you're eating
all your corn
starch
so we
should probably
take care
of them
before they
leave for
vorham
and their
meetings
hmm
maybe we
can placate
maybe we
can placate
them with
an offer
of captain
zedek
i would
rather not
be an
offering
to these
degenerate
no but
we get
like the
big pole
and like
you're tied
to the
pole
and we're
bringing it
up
like oh
and you
know
you know
but what
happens when
you don't
untie me
because you
just forget
that you
know i
can't
untie
myself
oh wow
i guess you
die
and you don't
see how
willing to
take
well it pains
me to admit
it lauren
but i think
you've been
reading zetiket
good luck
and then she
disappears
under the
box
now as
chief of
security
on this
vessel
i will
put an end
to that
survey
favorum
and you
can all
welcome
to
okay
later on
chief of
security
all right
so do we
have any
particular
meeting
place
that they
might be
trying to
entice these
people in
cargo bay
seven
okay
here's the
plan
here's the
plan
we're gonna
go there
all right
let's go
that's
it's not
very
planning
but
yeah we
could check
the manifest
and see if
there's
anything
there that
they could be
able to
help
us
with
so
let's
see
if
there's
anything
that
they could
help
us
with
so
let's
see
if
there's
anything
that
they could
help
us
with
so
let's
see
if
they could
help
us
we're
going to
go
to
the
hospital
and
see
if
there's
anything
that
they could
help
us
with
and
if
there's
anything
that
they could
help
us
with
navcoms around the ship
I would like to locate the nearest navcom
why don't any of the
why don't all the cargo holds have security
that's where the
cargo is stored, Captain
what do you mean they wouldn't have security cameras
sometimes we have
guards, sometimes we have cameras
sometimes we have a sign that says
don't come in
sometimes you have nothing is what you're telling me
there are budgetary concerns
yes, that's probably where some of the
budget is going, that's probably where those
damned surrogates you sent
the surrogate limbs you sent
were probably stolen out of
do you have any idea how many important things could have gone missing
oh, this is going to
hurt
I have an idea
uh-huh
uh-huh
that's it, I have an idea
let's check the bloody cameras
and see if there's something there
alright, Zedek
I would like to go to the nearest
console and make a tech check
to see if we can determine if there's a camera
inside
absolutely, you come to this
this cogitator unit on one of the walls
you can pen in your
access codes, but give me a tech check
to see what
happily
it's
it's coming
it's doing its thing
it's my role, Tony
chugga chugga chugga chugga chugga
the day we go to a foundry will be great
the best slate plans
sorry, roll 20, but you're really blowing chunks
just staring
Zedek, maybe describe how your button
how your finger presses the button
I press the one
followed by the two
followed by
I gingerly
tap the fingerprint reader
on the console to activate
its admin function
if you've got your
like, dice results
you can just, like, slash R
and we can just roll those for now
oh, there it goes
oh, there it is
oh, nice
alright, you have managed
able to, you are successfully able
to enter in the data
and as you do that, you see the cameras
all of which
are stained
stained?
oh
stained red
so is it a red-tainted
visage, or are they
just red?
just this, like, red
that shows up on the screen
like, is it a
I think he's already asking
is it opaque, or can we see through it?
oh, no, no, no, it's solid
it's just a solid red
terrific
well, I think we have a sign
let's head to where that camera
is set up, and
obviously, someone's vandalizing your stuff
Captain Zedek, and we must go down
and deal with the perpetrators
you're right, and if someone's vandalizing
my precious
stocks of my ship, I am happy to
murder them extrajudicially
again
so you make your way
to Cargo Bay 7, which
has a large
sort of loading dock entrance
which you see is open, and there's various
crates that dot the entire
area, it's got this
kind of stagnant air
as you come in, are you sticking
together as one group, is one of you going
ahead, how are you, like, entering
this area?
let's not, Scooby,
as a group
I will lead the group
in case we get attacked by something
horrible, like the color
red, technically it's not my department
since I was refused the position of
chief of red, but nevertheless
I'll put that on duty
you all
get away
since you're at the lead, Pybrain, can you
give me an awareness test?
ah, yes, Py
Pybrain can try
an awareness test
notorious for his very high awareness
abilities, he's an incredibly alert
skidari ranger
who got three successes
and a complication
excellent
good
um
you make your way
through the area, but as you do
suddenly
memories wash over you
and you're distracted
you hear something
but you can't make out the specific
because you're suddenly
distracted and reminded and concerned
for tater tot
this complication is entitled
Concern for the Tot by Joe E
and yeah, you
feel like you were just about to hear something
and you would have heard exactly what it was
but you just kind of hear this muffled sound
but as you were just
about to, like, grasp what it was
you think of tater tot
oh, by the omnesia
I forgot to give
tater tot his first...
bionic eyeball
I don't know
you've got the time for this
but, like, I don't know how much
two babies eat, he might be dead
he's been taking
I'm sorry, you threw me for a loop
he's going to be fine
the servitors are taking care of him
they don't get messed up by warp storms
focus on the task at hand, man
does he, like
how many steaks a minute
does he need to eat
baby biology is confusing
ah, very well
at any rate
I believe
you're talking about the tater tot
and out from the shadows
emerge several figures
these hunchback
reddish skinned
covered in boil
figures, one of which
carrying an immense stick
that ends in a syringe
another one coming out
that has these strange white robes
and
what is clearly
an upside down boot
that it's wearing as a hat
oh, hey there
good to see y'all
heard you're talking about
that tater tot there
you know, the other gangs
in the lower decks
they be fighting over
that tater tot right now
they all trying to get a hold of him
that little tot
he's such a little rascal
and the one in the back
sort of steps word
with the stick
little poke poke
little poke poke
oh, not these damn things again
you're saying the lower decks
man?
know about tater tot?
oh yeah, they're having a big ol'
big ol' fight over tater tot
they are
do you listen to me
you sallow slouch
sanguinary sausage
how did they learn about the child?
uh, would you like to give me
some kind of social skill
to influence them
to give you more information?
yes, I will use intimidation
of course
I'm going to put in three
three glory behind it
alright
I am good with that
yeah
here we go
I press the button
and now
we supplicate the machine spirits
and get six successes
yeah
oh yeah, oh yeah
they know about the tater tot
they took him from the daycare
and now they
he's been trading among
all them gangs down here
but not us
we're not with them
we're with the
the severe fervorum now
we are
you know
just because they
they were okay with us
doing a little poke poke
to check out what they're doing
at the same time
at the same time?
at the same time
at the same time
at the same time
at the same time
at the knowledge of them
having stole tater tot
captain that is going to grab
the one with the boot
and just start screaming at him
now do listen to me here fervent
I'm supremely pissed off
at what you just told me
so you will tell me
what happened to that small
innocent boy
or I will splatter you
over this room
well I'm uh
I'm sorry to say
we probably won't know
the results of that
for a few months
until the lower gangs
are done all their fighting
and uh
once we uh
get the results
from all their fight
and then we'll know
which gang ends up with the top we will
uh captain
if I
may I
I actually have a
I have a question
I wish to ask
as well as
an attempt
to figure this out
boop boop
you may
one
didn't I kill you?
what where
didn't we
didn't I burn you
and didn't Pi
cut you into pieces
back on that
I remember
awful planet
awful planet
like a lot of you
oh
Sven
ah
the old brother trick
ah
I'm sorry
for your loss
we came in here
when you reloaded
we're all new blood-backed
you see
we came in here
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
that was
in my mind
it's just like
I know what you mean
but they brought the thing
I just imagine
as we're reloading
our weapons
they got on board
so
yeah
you were all
reloading your weapons
and we went
in a cargo ship
with all the last guns
and
it was real easy
like we all wanted to come to space
thought there'd be stuff up here
to poke poke
and now we know
it's up security around here
so you know
the uh
I'm very sorry
the name eludes me
what's the name of the
the group
uh
the Servori Fervorum
the Servori Fervorum
you know
these people then
Servori Fervorum
you're a part of them
you said
the the front one with the boot
oh well
you know
I got the boot now
and that means
I'm one of them
the boot
is a symbol
ooh
ooh
ah
ah
I'm on the beam again
I'm tired of getting scared
and all that shit
so
can we
wait
I'm on the beam
for fuck's sake
I'm on the
in the area
where is it
just
cut off
like a
rafter above us
oh well
uh
you got
are you responsible
for the ghost noise
oh no no
you're like the high priest
you got the
you got the touch
you got the power
yeah
fuck you
I'll fucking kill you
do you understand me
you earned that
and you'd guide us to them
out of curiosity
and I will do a persuasion
with our
three remaining glory
yeah
uh
where is
bonus die
two three
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
oh
three
got it
oh nice
seven
seven
yeah
uh
I don't think it rolled the extra dice
yeah
just rolls it separately
just our 3d6 it then
uh
uh
seven
that adds
three
yeah ten wow
um
ten hits
well uh
we could
we could
we could take it
or I could
in fact
we got some extra costumes here
uh
let me
let me
and we can get going.
Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
What do the costumes look like?
They're legitimately
just the boot the blood-backed has
on its head. He's just handing each
of you a boot to put on your head.
Oh, so maybe
that's what they were trying to say through the wailing.
They weren't saying boo, they were saying
boot.
He's always cut them off before they can finish.
I bequeath unto you a boot
to the head. Very well, let's go.
I put on the fucking boot.
I don my boot.
Is that a good way?
I have quite a good boot.
And with that, our
group makes their way towards
the meeting of the
Servi Favorum, where I think we're gonna
take a quick break
here, and then we'll come back.
Reboot!
Come.
Break time, everybody.
We'll be right back.
Charizard is better than Blue-Eyes White Dragon.
Yeah, he won't find
any, uh, any, you know,
fighting for me on that one. I think Kaiba's
a dumbass. Okay, alright.
Kaiba's a visionary. Kaiba
was the blueprint, man. Kaiba
is the only motherfucker
who can drive around in a giant
plastic toy-ass
looking jet fighter
and, like, still
keep, like, respectability.
Imagine a world where Ash Ketchum,
instead of having the, you know, physical Pokemon,
was card game, and then he got stoned
into the Yu-Gi-Oh! world, where he fought with his
Pokemon cards against Yu-Gi-Oh!
cards, and then he fought
instead of Kaiba with all of his
Pokemans. Just imagine.
Just imagine he's all of a sudden,
I use my Blue-Eyes White Dragon, and he
summons fucking Mega Charizard.
Yeah. If you're giving me
a stroke right now,
it'd be better. Okay, are we talking about, like,
G1 Ash Ketchum? Are we talking about, like,
up to, like, the new continuity
of the action wins?
Okay, so, G1 Ash Ketchum
is gonna get smoked.
This kid's gonna get deleted
by Seto Kaiba. He's gonna go right
to the Shadow Realm, also known as Hell.
Kaiba's a buster. You know
this. He got beaten by
Exodia. That's, like, impossible to put together.
He made his own card! He's a fucking Giga Chad!
He made his own
card. He's a loser.
No, he's not. He has money. He's
so cool.
Are you one of the people who cardboard drew
their own Pokemon fan cards?
No, because his is canon.
Yeah.
He makes the game. Come on.
Yeah, I'd be a loser.
Pitch your game on! I'd be real.
I'd be real. The biggest Chadwick
Von Thundercock in Yu-Gi-Oh! is
Pegasus. Agreed.
No, he's going to the private eye because
he has the audacity to use Flame Swordsman
in this, the modern era
of Yu-Gi-Oh!
I got myself a card. It's full of
Master Cards, Yu, because I'm going to
lose it because it's Flame Swordsman.
It's only a baby dragon. He's crap.
It may look
like a baby dragon, but
once it ages, it'll get
diabetes.
Once it ages, it'll die.
My name is Joey Wheeler.
I control the waves and who dies.
Flame Swordsman!
Kunai
with Chain.
Flame!
I like that I switched this back
to prepare for warp travel
because this is fucking appropriate.
This is what happens on the outside.
The echo is no longer
whoo! It's now Flame
Swordsman!
I like to imagine
inside the deck,
it's like, oh no, the tribes and stuff
have data taught. Then outside, it's like
Charizard's better, man!
Blue Eyes by the Dragon! Shit!
And then just fucking, it's just
spirits and...
everything just arguing about
carcasses.
Fucking Sean the Warp Entity, yup.
Yeah.
But as we're going through the hallway...
Yeah, so you are...
you have now convinced the group
of blood-backed stowaways
to take you with them to the
Survey for Vorums
meet-up deeper in the
depths. The eight
blood-backed that accompany
you lead you into
an immense section
at the lowest level of the lower decks
that, Captain Zedek, you didn't
even know such a place existed.
It's an immense
cathedral-like chamber
with
bright lights
that are coming off of immense
marble columns that soar up.
Pews line
the entryway forward
and to the sides, and as you come
in, you see the entire
room is filled
with easily...
50-plus
ratlings that are all sitting
down.
Ratlings? Why is it always more
ratlings? Each of the ratlings
wears
a boot on their head,
much like this piece of art here.
An immense black plastic
boot that comes off
of their head,
and they wear white and red
robes with a single
almost stitched
on symbol of a black
boot.
At this point, it just feels like
they're making fun of me.
They say, looking at my giant
cog on my chest.
Kloos! Kloos!
Kloos! They speak as you
come in, the chanting. Far,
far at the other side.
And as you come in, the bloodbats sort of
usher you,
go sit there, and they point to one of the
pews. Go, go, go, get sitting.
Ah, this is all...
all wrong. This is... we don't have rooms
for a cathedral in this shit. Even I,
in my ineptitude, know that we...
this is a fucking Avenger-class
construct, not a sword class.
Well, at least you said it.
Hey, Thurston, crazy question.
Ooh, yes.
Because I'm not a dope, would I
actually know where this room is?
Um, do you have any skill checks you'd want
to, uh...
I suppose the best one that I could
proffer for that would be...
possibly just be, like, a scholar
to be like, yeah, I know this kind of
layout of a ship. Absolutely.
Uh, can I use
one additional glory just to
make that a nice, even ten?
No argument from
the GM.
Not that my voice matters.
Nice, it gave me eight and a glory, and it didn't roll the
other one, so I will roll the additional
d6 and get a nine and a glory.
Sweet, yeah. So,
um, as you are sort of, like,
filing in, you recognize that this should
be... should be a septic unit,
but this has been completely
remodeled.
Oh, well,
that actually gives me an idea.
Uh, Captain, I believe we are in a
spare septic tank.
Woo!
And then the chanting of the other one's
Gruus. Gruus. Gruus.
You said it's a septic tank? I figured
it'd be this low down, but again, it's...
The ship shouldn't have this.
We didn't even have the resources
to build this on the ship normally, and they
asked me for it.
Is it possible, Captain, that under one of your
drunken stupors, you attempted to purchase
the materials to do it, and then lost them?
No, because I
declined them purposefully. I didn't want them
to build the cathedral out of something nicer on the ship.
I flipped through page
457 of
Zetiket.
And it said, well,
it might say here that, um,
one who wears,
is about the, uh, copious
amount of sheets, resources,
and things, are nerds.
So you
maybe just bought it and forgot it.
That could be... No.
Children!
A voice bellows
from a pulpit far at the other end
as you see a rattling step up
several slight
stairs that have been kind of set up
in front of the pulpit, and
it clutches onto some
strange device that you're not
sure what it is.
This one has an immense
boot over its head that looks as though
it has, like, a heel
coming out of it,
and also is clutching onto
this device that has a
large, what appears to be red
button, and this
black body with a metal shaft
coming out of it.
Hmm.
Is that
in any way familiar to us, or is it
literally just, like, a weird object that we
have no idea what it is? Uh, you could give me a tech check if you
want to try. I think that
I remember this.
I will draw as well.
Okay.
Bingus, I get a four and a glory.
I get a six, and I
don't get a glory. Okay.
Uh, well, the four and the glory
and the six, uh, the six
actually, you know what, both of these are enough.
You can tell that it's a
flamer. It's a very
old model flamer.
It's a flamer unit used
by, I don't know,
very, very low-tech worlds.
Is it
old in the good way, or
old in the bad way?
Old in the highly effective
way.
Yes.
I want his gun.
We have done
well! All hail
Cruz Cruz
Cruz Cruz.
And then one of the blood back behind you sort of
leans forward.
We don't know why, but it says
they got a little, little talk talk going on,
so we should, uh, watch.
We're watching.
We're watching.
Soon. Soon
we shall.
Soon we shall
finish our great ritual.
I raise my hand.
Brain!
Brain's up! Brain down!
I have a question!
Oh.
Um, okay.
So...
Hi, Brain.
Would you like to make me a
deception check?
Yes.
Would you like to spend any
glory on this deception?
I'd like to spend all of our glory.
Fine. Do it.
I'm okay.
Take the rest.
Let's go!
Oh! Six with another glory!
Good rolls today.
Wow. Yeah. Very dead on.
Yes, child.
What is your question?
Um,
I have, uh,
recently been kicked in the skull
and forgot what the purpose of the
ritual is. What is it?
And then you just
hear from all of the rattling Cruz.
Cruz.
I'll be praised!
As the high priest
raises up the flamer above his
head.
For we have obtained
the holy artifact!
And he points, um,
in front of him towards
a brazier
that's been set up?
And the brazier's
covered with this sort of, like,
metal topper.
Though you can see small holes around it.
We shall
burn the artifact
and release its power
into this ship.
Cruz. Cruz. Cruz.
What does the artifact look like?
You can't see. It's shielded by this metal
cover. Like, there's little light
going in, but, like, you'd have to actually get
up out of your seat and
walk over to it. Do you guess that, like,
from where you are, Lorne, it's about ten
meters away?
Oh, what happens
once it is released?
Uh,
then
we shall be blessed
with the presence
of divinity.
Uh, hey, GM,
crazy question.
From the seated position, and I may or may not
have put this together, I may be wrong, though.
Could I, are the
holes big enough that you could, like,
shout at them?
Yeah.
Can, can Reeb attempt to
talk to the artifact?
Like, from his seated
position, or would I have to, like...
I mean, there's two pews in front of you full of
ratlings, so you'd be, like, shouting over
two rows of ratlings, but you could.
What, what,
what would be a good role for that? Because
I don't actually know.
Um, oh, gosh,
I'm pretty, I, I, I'm pretty open
as long as it's not psychic mastery,
Lorne. Um, maybe
a stealth, like...
A stealth, like,
like, I'm trying to very carefully
address the artifact.
Well, not alerting the other guys.
Yeah, I'd say stealth. I'd say, like, you could use
stealth for that. Uh, how much we got?
Oh, we got one glory. Brilliant. I will use our one
last glory. Sure. Good, good.
Glorious, Ben. Sweet.
Okay, we have a four, and...
A four.
And a four. Uh, what are you, uh,
what are you going to try to communicate?
Uh, I will ask the artifact
how you doing?
That's it.
Ooh!
As the voice overtakes the entire chamber.
Ooh!
Reap's gonna,
he's gonna, like, rest
his head sideways on his hand and his,
on his, like, knees.
Gentlemen,
I believe the thing
that is making the wooing noise
is a very small
rattling.
Ah? Have you found it?
Where's the thing now?
Oh.
Oh. Rattlings.
I shall begin, brother!
As the high priest
points to you, uh, Pi,
and then begins descending
this sort of dais they're at.
I shall begin
by setting it aflame.
He starts walking down with the
barbecue lighter. Wait!
Wait!
Wait! I say
as I start walking towards him.
Yeah, you get out of the pew, start
walking.
I'm waking up. Wait!
I walked out another step.
Yeah? Wait!
Slowly, just
hold on!
I have something to say!
I walked out another...
Give me another fucking deception check
you goddamn...
I'm actually gonna ask
one other thing, GM.
Where's the control console for the septic tank?
Um...
That would be a tech check, dude.
Oh, balls. Alright.
Do that, too.
Alright. Well, I'll be using...
The four.
Could I potentially
instead
roll
intimidation or stealth?
I mean, if you want to use intimidation, that's fine, too.
Like, if you're trying to shout down
the high priest, that's okay.
Yeah, because I have
one dice in deception.
Yeah, that's fine.
That's fine.
We'll roll intimidate.
And by the
omnisci, I let this be a
successful roll. Once the
machine's spirits have got your dog,
I'm coming, coming back for goddammit.
Just refresh and hit it again.
Yeah, hit it again.
I believe in you. I will also...
And as I...
As I...
Oh, as you complicate with nothing.
No, no, no, the first one wasn't that.
The first one
was the success.
Success.
I'll take the first one.
If you do the second one,
Pi stands up, and then all you hear is,
Um, wait, uh...
Um, the three
seems to, to, like,
be a pause as the
high priest has taken a few more steps forward
and you've taken a few more steps forward, Pi.
And then the high priest sort of, like,
cocks his, like,
invisible eyebrows because the, the,
like, top of the boot is hiding
them.
Yeah.
And he points
the lighter flamer
at you.
You're, you're the one
who possessed the holy relic!
We're the holy relic
caretaker!
Hold on.
We brought the holy relic here!
Wait.
Wait.
We can't keep doing this shit.
Yeah, you're right, I can't.
How close am I to this guy?
Ah, you're...
Let's see here.
Uh, you're within seven meters.
Okay.
And by the way, there was a four on the tech.
Is that not enough?
Uh, no, no, sorry.
Uh, Reeve, you would, you would know that
there, the control units are usually, like,
either at the entrance to the deck,
so probably, uh, outside of this immediate area.
Though you're also, that tech would be enough
to tell you, like, the, the workings here
have been basically covered up.
So, this, this part of the septic unit
wouldn't even work anymore.
Hmm.
They just built over it.
Now that I have the attention of everybody.
Yes.
I'm like, yes!
You know who I am?
Then say my name!
All right, Vince.
Uh, there are shouts.
Shouts.
Shouts?
Kra Terre.
No, that's not it.
You got it wrong.
I'm like rushing up with my staffers.
Let's get going, boys.
Which one of you would like to go first in this combat?
You are surrounded by several Rowlings
both in front but behind.
I think Piebrain would like the newly honors
during this situation.
Mm-hmm.
Honestly, I think, I thought,
I think we've been here before, haven't we?
I'm getting a sense
of deja vu. Yes.
I
think I figured out the mystery,
but Pybrain certainly has not.
All right.
If I
have the power to go
first.
All right! You've waited long enough!
And I take off the boot, and I'm gonna charge
with my power sword.
Um, yeah, okay, so you
like, discard the boot and
rush towards the high priest?
Yes, I am. Absolutely.
Uh, so yeah, you, like, rush around the brazier
that's sort of in the middle.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm just like,
I assume you're going around it, you're not, like,
toppling it or anything?
Oh, man, that'd actually be really
cool if I toppled it.
And you would crush anything in its path,
including the thing you're trying to save.
Oh, yeah,
true, true. Yeah, in that case, I'll just
walk around the brazier and just try to kind of
body block this priest.
Stop him from throwing this artifact in.
And the best way I can think to do that
is to hit him with my enormous sword.
Sure.
And so I will make a charge
attack
for Lemuria!
And with my mighty
power sword in hand, we shall
see what happens with a critical hit!
And a glory!
A glory!
Wow!
Wow!
Very, very wow.
Uh, can you give me a 2d6
and we'll see what the critical does.
Sure thing, partner.
Let us behold the majesty.
51!
A 51 on the critical
is overpowering assault.
A stunning blow sends the foe lurching away,
senses blurred by the brutal impact,
suffers d6 shock, and is
staggered. You can apply more
shock by spending glory, but
in this case, roll me damage,
please.
That's an academic point, if anything.
Very well, I will roll damage
for the might
of Lemuria!
Oh, can I shift that, uh, uh, uh,
icon? Uh, yes,
you will still hit it.
Yes! Here we go!
Here come...
Here come the 20!
Roll 20 keeps fucking with our
climactic moments!
The stabbing!
Yes, let us
see! Let us see!
Come on!
Come on!
I just, like, imagine you're, like, in slow motion,
sword coming down, and it's like,
Yeah, it's like I got, like,
I'm, like, shoulder-checking this
little man with, like, my
sword slowly coming
up from the line, it's starting
to reach up, and oh my god,
why is it so bothering?
Uh, alright, I'm just gonna roll.
Just roll that, yeah, roll that thing.
Yeah, I'm getting, uh,
strength plus two, so that's gonna be...
Uh, uh,
uh, uh, uh,
alright, uh, uh,
oh, yeah, there you go, okay.
Oh, wow.
That seems like a lot for damage.
That might be, I don't think I roll that much
usually. That is a...
Well, I have, it's strength plus
the two icons I shifted, right?
Well, you don't add your, like, your
strength just gets added to the base damage.
Oh, yeah, and then I rolled way too much.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Uh, alright, back to the Amnesian
X, I see.
Oh, yeah, yeah,
damn, back in the early proto games.
Yeah, okay, so I don't get
that many. I'm sorry, I'm so used to, like,
the formula of roll 20. It's fine.
There we go. There it is, look at that.
There it is. Yeah, 14 damage.
That's pretty, that's pretty rad.
You got AP three, look, you got
that all going on.
So, da-da-da-da-da.
Ah!
He takes the hit.
This is a bulky
boy. And as
Chunk, as the Chunky
Rattling takes the slice
from the Power Sword and kind of
daggers back slightly from the
impact of the staggering
strike, um,
kind of breathes
back, uh!
Um, his move
is reduced by half. Oh, no.
Okay.
I will, I will go.
And I will.
Aw.
He has to go, boys.
He's, he's, he's
going to...
Oh, no. No, you know what? No, I know
exactly what to do. This,
this group of Rattlings
on the, on the right hand of Frank
comes up in a
charging mass.
They shout,
Heretic!
Heretic!
Heretic as they come off of the pews and
rush towards you.
Um, they, they all, like, as
they run out, pull out
small, like, butcher
knives and begin slashing
in the air as they rush
towards you. Um,
and, yeah,
they are going to
come at you
with a whole bunch of extra
attacks here, so.
Come on, if you think you're hard enough!
...
We're waiting slowly
and surely
as the things go.
I believe, I believe as they, as they
rain down blows, or at least try to
rain down blows. I'll just...
Wouldn't you say they're raining
up blows? Because they're
small!
Oh-ho-ho-ho!
Woo-ho-ho-ho!
Oh, the real guy's coming up. Do you have a gun
soundboard, Aaron? They'll just...
Like, bam, dead.
Oh, my God!
Uh, five, which...
Does that hit your defense? That is equal to my
defense. Yeah, so it will hit you.
In a shocking ton of events.
Seven there, but whatever! I still
hit you, yay! For people confused,
Pybering gets an additional defense when he's
in melee. That's why it's four on the thing.
He gets five in melee.
It's a filthy cheater.
A cheater. He is.
And with all of these
attacks, uh...
You die.
I also get...
Ooh, very good, very good.
Uh, so that...
Thirteen total, as they
stabbing comes down on you!
Thirteen? Wow!
These are scary ratlings.
This is what happens when they fight as an actual
mob together.
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
Alright, well, I'm going to be ignoring all but four
of that. Okay. So,
I am going to roll some Determination.
Yeah! And I will
soak, uh, three.
That's why I will take three shock.
Yeah. And one
wound. Oh, one. Yeah, okay. And then
would you, like, two-counter it? Or
is that only when they missed?
No, I could do it now.
The thing is, here's my question to you,
Thorstein. Yes, yes. Is this
High Priest going anywhere? I mean,
he has X-Axis yet. Well, he's
surrounded by his guys. He's staggered.
Yes.
So, can he move on his
turn? I mean, he can move half speed.
In that case, I will...
I will not. I will not. I would
rather, uh, charge through these tiny little
bodies and get him if he decides to go
somewhere. Okay. Who would like
to go next? I've got a proposal to
the rest of our party, by the way.
Near as I can tell, these
guys don't suspect us just yet.
Can we, can we
let them
all mob in on Pi and then blow
them up? Reap!
I mean, that is
very plausible. I have
two spells to nuke them all.
The problem
is, if we doubt ourselves too early,
we have more to deal with
than him.
Our, uh, our current
surroundings are really bad for us to
start fighting.
Thorstein, I need to ask
you something.
Have you been, have you been
sending Urndel secret messages
before and after sessions saying
do anything you, if you kill
Pi, if you get Pi killed,
you'll get such and such
bonus XP? Look, so far,
the two ways I've been able to hurt you have been
stabbing you with a whole mob of Rattlings and
your own party setting you on fire.
So I'm taking what I can get here.
You've been, you've been
supplying these people with gifts.
Speaker, unlike last time, this is
not an abstraction, so I can't,
I couldn't see where they were in relation
to you. Now I can.
So now I can avoid getting you.
The problem is, is if we act
now, we might die.
You, you,
you came out of that with three shock and one
wound. I don't see our chances
being much good or better,
but I write good with me.
Who wants to go next?
I, I
could propose, I don't, I don't have to
attack this turn, but I want to set
up myself, I guess.
No one else wants to do a thing.
No.
No, if you're going for set up, I'm
going to let this happen.
Okay, so I'm going to
move over to my friend,
over this way, in between these
pillars, as if I'm like, you know, getting
protecting my flanks. Cover, yeah.
And I'm like, I'm like, okay, boys,
I'll make a dome, don't worry.
It can help with any damage we might
cause, and I then do
telekinetic dome, and I'm going
to spend
one glory, just to
kind of increase that one maybe
chance that I can make that
happen, boost it up a little bit
more. So telekinetic dome, and boom!
And I'm going to spend
a wrath, because I rolled terribly.
Yeah, absolutely.
Because I only got a two out of that,
and I need a lot more to really make that work
for some reason, so.
There we go, there we go.
There we go.
Unfortunately, I didn't do well enough to like,
yeah, I can't shift anything, which is a bad
thing, but
yeah, so I did a dome,
so basically it is like,
covers yourself, yeah.
Yeah, so it only does myself,
unfortunately, but I move around
as I decide.
I tried.
Awesome.
I tried.
I'm going to help you all!
Nah, fuck it.
My head hurts.
Be desperate.
Yeah, so unfortunately,
well, basically, I'm protected.
Yes.
And that's my turn.
That does nothing to sway my
idea of how this is going to go down.
I'm just setting myself up.
Now, we do have glory,
if we want to.
Interrupt.
And we have two left.
Two?
If you want to, are you guys going to?
Does someone wish to interrupt?
I really don't.
I'm going to be honest, this is still really bad.
Especially since Lawrence is only covering himself
with the telekinetic dome.
I tried!
No, I appreciate it,
but also, I'd still die.
Okay, so
none of you are going.
We're just sitting.
Two pews in front of you start rushing forward.
They all get up and form kind of this
this lion watching the mob that has descended on Pi Brain.
Okay.
Either Zedek or Reeb, you're up, your choice.
If you don't mind, I'm just going to move up this turn.
I will.
Yeah, go ahead and move.
Yeah, go ahead and move.
Just scoot up.
I imagine you're walking at me doing deception.
Like, yeah, kick his ass!
Get him!
You're supposed to use your abilities
to help your allies, not hinder them!
Okay, so you walk up.
What are you going to do when you get there, Zedek?
I'm not going to attack.
I'm just going to overwatch and just like
sit and wait for my time to strike.
He steps down.
Just XCOM overwatch.
Yeah.
The next time.
Why?
Can the next set of views continue to form a watching line of Pi Brain?
Reeb?
This is slowly turning into a Rattrace game.
Can I push my position further down?
Like, I'm not going to if I don't act, can I go after the next group?
Hmm.
Delay.
Yeah, like you can be like, you want me just to basically you want to have the other
Rattling groups go?
Yeah, I'm kind of waiting for them to get into a better position.
I'm just I'm just sitting in the on the next group.
Mm hmm.
Yeah, go ahead.
I will.
Yeah, that's the next group.
All right.
And then, OK.
At this point, Reeb will just kind of calmly stand up and reach for my flamer.
OK, OK.
So you have this this line.
Of like 30 plus Rattling's.
As I approach them from the back, because they're all like shouting and chanting for
like the fight going on.
Gross, gross, gross.
You can you can just hear Reeb go.
And they all like there's this slow turn from a few of them.
Oh.
I'm going to take our I'm going to take our two extra glories and I'm going to toast.
Oh, I believe annihilated five and.
Slash are two to six.
I know that I do you want to spend wrath to reroll those?
They get as many as you can.
I will.
Yeah, I will.
Yeah, you're one of my things in the lake.
Oh, yeah, that's way better.
There you go.
That's a nine total.
That's way better at a nine.
Way better at a nine.
OK, cool.
So that's good.
And that's a lot.
I can shift.
Where is your target?
I suppose the question.
So thinking on that, I think I would like to hit the ones directly in front of me
just because these guys will take a little bit longer to get to me.
OK, so I'll get these ones.
OK, so. This guy right here.
So basically, like you can.
So first of all, you you pick a point.
So like the range of your weapon is and is that correct?
I believe that is still it.
Yeah, it's no.
The range is 20 on the flamer. 20.
OK, OK.
So you pick like a target that you want to hit.
Probably like I'm guessing
the one at the center here.
Yeah. OK, so now this is this is how flamers work.
Which is redonkulous.
So you like go like up to there.
In fact, you could go like there, right?
And then you hit hit all of these these in a line.
But for every shift you have of which you would have here, I think one or two
because you got to you can shift basically one meter
so you can move it so you get one, two, three, four, five, six, seven of them
by shifting.
Mm hmm.
Actually, eight. So.
One, two.
So that as you go, that's
what you could always do is you could move to like over here
and you can get the fucking Warhammer fantasy style flame attack.
But if they don't die, then I'm right in front of them.
But you're right in front of them in either case.
I mean, you've got to assume so.
Yeah, I already said their turn.
Yeah, they did do their turn.
So up to you.
Do I have enough distance further?
I moved two to get up here and then that would be
three to get to four to get there.
That's it.
You can also reroll your glory and see if you can get more.
You know what, I will.
I will actually take that suggestion and I will move here before I start firing.
OK, and then you will. Oh gosh.
That's wanted by you can get.
Yeah.
i'll go to there and i will go to there so that gets nine and two so that's 11
because i think i miss i miss these two and i miss these two roll me uh roll me damage
all right now that now comes the fun part
uh okay boom 10 10 okay um nothing i mean it's still gonna gonna do a lot of hurt because it's
mob it just means that a bunch of them are gonna die terrible deaths okay uh we'll split some
as your your your flamer goes through and
just
starts tearing however when you begin barbecuing tim when you begin barbecuing these 10 uh of the
who all like char and collapse and break into husks and
yeah yeah um as that all happens something appears where they
hear this and and it goes louder
and louder and appearing where the corpses fall is this gruesome spectral form that rises up
and and these these these ghost-like cultists begin moving floating through the sky
towards right over here behind the um
behind the pulpit where they start lining up
and then then they be then some of them begin climbing on top of each other
forming the basis of a pyramid a pyramid of ghosts
oh no we dealt with the four kings before now it's the deacons of the deep
no by the omniscient our darkest fears confirm
oh no we dealt with the four kings before now it's the deacons of the deep
and uh at that point i will then go
and uh at that point i will then go
with the high priest who
with the high priest who
attacks you pi'brain i forget he would
enjoy your communication oh i get a
enjoy your communication oh i get a
enjoy your communication oh i get a complications
complications
complications tab located but i think a five hits you
offerings tap located but i think a five hits you
offerings tab located but i think a five hits you so that's cool
so that's cool
so that's cool it does equal my defense
it does equal my defense
it does equal my defense oh this is good
oh this is good
oh this is good i'm gonna use this one from sirius dc
i'm gonna use this one from sirius dc
i'm gonna use this one from sirius dc uh it's called unstable ammo
uh it's called unstable ammo
which is the ammo of the weapon falls out and explodes oh i see i like complications they're
ha ha funnies firebomb but let me do the attack here just to see if that hurts you uh i can't
shift anything we'll see if damage uh 12 12 with his ritual close combat flamer it's a close combat
flamer oh my gosh all right yes that's gonna be three damage going through i'll try to soak
um yeah it's cool i'll soak one and i will take okay um okay and um then as he's beating you
with the butt of this flamer there's this chunk as she cracks something against your your like
outer metallic armor and this leaking substance begins
spilling the ground around him and there's this hush like
and then then it explodes
no you fool now now pie brain you have not taken a reaction yes now you can as a reaction here
essentially take a full defense which will grant you extra resilience against whatever damage would
hit you and potentially allow you to avoid being
saved
fire by this however if you do that you can't basically move or take actions during your next
you're giving me a devil's bargain yeah i am i've learned to hurt you and it's fire
thanks for that pros gamer tip reeb all right here's my question
mm-hmm if i spend a wrath okay
i'm like and try to throw a rattling on top of the fire can i gain the benefits of a full defense
without losing my actions i will i will allow this because it's fucking hilarious
in that case i see this no i think it's grab a little person who's like
you
and i throw him on
whoa
uh why
why
why
uh we we have fun here we're a group of fun
uh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah okay um so you're going to dodge um
okay so what i need you to do israv
give me an initiative
I would love nothing more
yes
and every every success
counts as plus one to your resilience
I am
going to take that and then I'm going
to use
my final wrath
and re-roll
excellent do it
for a frankly insane
amount giving me defense
that's that's good let's see
if this damages you
it does not
would you roll a straight
zero I buy it
should the damage isn't calculated there for
some reason but it should be
it should be 10 plus so
so it matches you
would actually take one point of shock which
I think is fitting as this
thing explodes and takes
out all of the rattlings nearby
and
the hybrid
and then ignites the
brazier
the leaking fluids
go under it and ignite
bursting upwards as you've taken
the brunt of the blast
pie from sheltering
behind a rattling but the top of the
of the brazier bursts
up and suddenly you can see
flying up out of the brazier
floating in the air
for a moment
a micro
second in time before it's
incinerated is
femur
and it's then
ripped
sunder into flame
followed by
and my
legs
how now
as suddenly appearing
out
it's a spectral entity
that you have seen before
that you have seen before
that you have seen before
i point at him
i point at him
the divine lord of fervor
the divine lord of fervor
everyone
it's them
it's a geraldine
i require now
i require now all of you
to give me a resolve
to give me a resolve test
here we go boys
i will preemptively take the last two glories
i will preemptively take the last two glories
i will preemptively take the last two glories
can i even add glory to a resolve test
can i even add glory to a resolve test
uh yeah i am good with it
uh yeah i am good with it
you go
zero
i see on my overlay i have two wrath points
so is that because of the kindness of chat or have you just
forgot to take mine away
i didn't even know you spent one
yeah he spent two
two rath die
okay so it was never clearly
okay uh-huh so it was never clearly
said so i missed it also i'm trying to so here's the issue with me trying to make it a dark mode
for roll 20 it also hides all the text so i'm trying to find my darn resolve roll i got a two
okay okay cool i got a uh nothing nothing i like it nothing so so so all of you
are afraid you are affected by fear which means you take a basically your difficulties
against the ghostly divine lord of fervor was manifested out of the flames
are too high i found it resolve i got a complication
how
hmm
hmm
I
i i think there's a really good one i can use here um i'm going to say i'm going to use this
one from a patreon person 8z which is entitled make a medicaid check on x the player becomes
convinced that a skill that is totally useless in this situation will prove useful and must spend
their next action making a skill check with that skill to try to find a solution i will ban you
from using psychic mastery no i have a question by the way can we tell for certain whether or not
that is pie's plated femur or if it's the one that i took it it appeared to be pie's plated femur
oh thank god for that
i still got mine
um all right so that's that uh at the end of the round the like the blood
ghost here oh no uh and then these cultists start like rushing up and that's the end of
the combat round that brings us to the next round y'all get to pick who goes first
oh uh you want me to keep going and clearing out the chaff
that would be
quite nice
alright well if no one has a problem with that i'll just you know go go over here actually
being further away actually helps yes i think i could hit this entire blob if i do that yes
i'm gonna do the fire bomb again
do it
i do the fire bomb from sonic
you cast fire
i cast fire explosion
i fire a explosion with a three and i have one left with the keyword explode diocesan
I have one last wrath, so I'm going
to redo that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
And get it up.
Damn! God!
Damn, sir!
I can shift two again.
Yeah, two.
Yeah, because the other one.
It's time to fire a gun.
Roll damage.
Now, of course, it decides to lag.
I want to see
your damage.
And I refresh.
Waiting for the damage.
Waiting for
the worms.
Damn, we want your damage.
Four.
No.
Oh, there we go.
Wow. Yeah. Good night, sweet
like princes. You murder
late twelve of them as like you
whoosh through
the next wave of
rattlings that were there. And again,
you see that as you destroy
their spectral forms, all begin
floating towards this area of the
room, joining up into
this like immense, humid
pyramid that they're raising up
into the sky.
And as it's
oh, and my legs
soon, I will be the tallest
with my legs.
Are you fucking me?
They're learning.
Terrifying stuff.
Super spooky episode.
I didn't even do I haven't done
much. I just came up here with like a
broom and just swept them
away past control.
All right.
Well, I suppose I will go
next.
I will go with
the ghost.
Yeah.
No, you won't.
I will interrupt you.
Would you would you like to interrupt
me? I went
away. I see this ghost.
This.
Operation of misused
motor force.
Yes.
And I know what I must
do.
Yes.
You die today.
We were already dead.
You're going to die a second time.
I can't. There's no easy way of
saying it. So I'm just going to hit
you and I'm going
to charge him.
OK.
And we'll do what we'll do
what Pi does
best.
And we're going to make.
A weapon.
So no wrath.
No glory.
Here it comes.
Here we go.
And it's a critical.
Yeah.
There you go.
You can shift one of those.
Oh, wow.
OK. Can I roll like to these things?
Yeah. Remember, remember, because
like you're at minus two.
Yeah. A bit minus one because you're
wounded. That's all.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
OK. OK.
Yeah. Roll your damage, please.
Fifty three.
Yeah. Oh, sorry. Fifty three for the
great critic.
Yeah. You do. Fifty three damage.
Yeah.
That's why I was like, I had a
moment there. I had a moment
overpowering assault.
Senses are blurred.
Oh, and he's staggered, but he's
immune to being staggered.
But it'll still take an extra D6
shock. So you can roll me that.
Yeah.
And then roll me regular damage.
Oh, nice.
Yeah, nice.
That's real good.
I guess I'm scared of him, but
he's also scared of me.
Well, you know, like you've you've
you've surprised him by rallying
so there's your damage so much.
Um, with 15
damage at AP three, I will
really undo
the mistake of the past.
This is just like this is just like
Elder Scrolls. If you hit a.
Ghost hard enough with any attack,
they will get hurt by it.
OK.
Yeah, you you you strike
him for some amount of damage.
His like ectoplasm
seeps out.
Where do you hit the ghost
specifically? I'm curious what
section of the ghost you're aiming
at.
At his legs.
OK, OK.
Yeah. You begin slashing and
every time you slash through, you
can tell that they're like they're
getting thinner, but they're
reforming almost immediately as you
slash through.
Now, I want to do a lot of effort to
get to go play to do.
I won't get to do that again.
Now, now I will go.
He will float away to
here.
Oh, would you like to take
an attack on him?
Yes, I would love to take an attack
on him. Go ahead.
Would this be a reflexive action or
would it be? It wouldn't be
counterattack.
No, no, this is just a like a
action.
Eight. Wow.
With an eight. So you'll you'll hit
and you can't shift, though.
So just roll damage again.
Yeah. And this is not charged
or anything.
With your like power dice here.
12 AP minus three.
Very nice.
Yeah. You managed to like
slash through.
Oh boy.
I'm going to spend a rune point
not to survive because he's got tons
of wounds, but I'm going to
replenish some of my shock.
And then I'm going to roll determination.
I'll stop through.
OK, so he's he's looking
like he's looking like hurt, but
like he definitely seemed to dodge
away from a lot of that,
though. You've got him worried like
you're not supposed to be this
effective.
You belong in a museum or a trash
can.
And he he goes
goes to this like beside this pillar
and he raises his his
hands up
and says, Oh, I beheld chaos
and I fell from the warp
like lightning and sticks
his hands out towards you as these
fissures in the immaterium
break through reality and course
towards you like
strange lightning
bolts of energy.
And let's see how
he does here.
Oh, no, he's turning down for a
Palpatine
with a complication and a three.
Oh, no,
the three will fail
the I can't use
my rune for this kind of stuff.
However, I actually do mark
me down a rune because I used a
psychic power there.
But now I have to roll on perils of
the world.
Oh, no, we wait.
Oh, no, we're in a war.
We're in war in the war.
Wait, if it's a psychic power, then
Lauren can try to deny the witch.
I mean, he failed it.
So failed to do anything.
Which which which.
But if you.
Passed that would have been cool.
And that was pretty cool, weekend,
really cool.
You realize we're about to be in
deep shit, right?
Yes. Yes, you are.
Because I'm not going to roll
on the table.
I'm going to roll on.
Oh, I'm going to.
I'm going to take one of the
complications from our lovely
patrons. In this case, one
shimmer gloom.
To who has provided
a lovely, lovely, lovely
lovely uh complication entitled the curse of sagarach oh come the fuck on
and holy fuck you all need to communicate in puns knock knock jokes or pantomimes
as he appears and begins dancing
and then disappears and then the ghostly divine lord of fervor stops his his assault as this
this clown-like entity briefly appears in existence and absorbs all of the fissures
arcing towards it no my power my legs um and that's their round who would like to go next
tell you didn't have a leg to stand on after that failure
what
you
I would like to kill I would like to attack
I'm going are you okay with that yeah I'm good with you going man don't worry you've been waiting
a long time no uh I'm putting my foot down but I can't stand this ghost
as soon as it there we go
so uh
yes here we go
yeah that complication I'm gonna spend a rap die to re-roll that
son of a bitch
that's fine that's fine it's good
um so you will you will miss as you are still afraid of this ghost
complication three
complications
um in this case uh you're charging with your your power saber right
correct
um
um
your power saber begins jolting as the machine spirit is incensed at the joke or at the pun you
just made this is literally a complication from one jeff called machine spirit incensed
and the the weapon is essentially rebelling against you and vibrating in your hand
at how bad your pun was this is a really bad time to have a complication
I'll kill you
fucking hate you
I hope you suffer an aneurysm
this is what the clown wants he wants to kill us he wants to kill each other with the puns
uh the swarm of cultists descends on the remaining cultists descend on my brain
uh rushing towards and like suddenly a terrifying
chant utters from their lips
kill the tall become the tall as they rush at you with knives
have you been stabbed by a bunch of rattlings before
we'll see uh that will miss so they just like bounce off your armor as they're all around you
going
kill the tall kill the tall um
all right
that's
that's
that's
that's a funny joke I didn't get the point
fucking hell
who wants to go next
uh
you've already gone
I know but I wanna I wanna plan my next move
and because I'm seeing a really good opportunity right here
please
I'm dying
I don't have any
time
you can go if you want
no no no no he's already gone lord you're the only one left
that's next turn
that's like a puns in in chat
saying there's a complication because it's not my turn you gotta wait
you gotta wait the turn
I assume that it is the uh the the blood back in the southern end that are still sitting in their pews diligently
who are like
relatable
they're doing nothing
they're fine
they're fine
cringe
what would you like to do lord
oh apparently I have to
apparently I have a fucking checklist to do
one I gotta make a shitty pun
two I gotta do something medical like
and three I apparently have to do something psychic or something to save the day
no you have to you have to use a skill check
that like is completely like
unrelated to this
so any skill you want
and you can still like it doesn't
prevent you from taking a multi-action
so you just increase the dn of your psychic test by two
I only have one psychic thing up already
like I get that thing already
yeah but if you want to cast a new one
then we're in
no no no no
if I cast a new one right now
regardless it's
I have nothing
like that complication makes no sense for me
there's nothing to do
it's because you're an old man
you've been in the mountains doing nothing
but looking at our finkery
it makes no sense
you've got like some skill
that you just really think is going to be important here
and who knows maybe if you roll high enough
it'll come true
I've been sitting here the entire time
trying to think of something
there's nothing
there's nothing I have
I'm blank
I'm sitting here like okay
what is he funny
there's nothing
there's nothing here
I'm trying to figure it out
I will fucking
I'm molten beams at it
wait
I've got it
I sidestepped to kill the ghost instead
I okay
we'll do something
oh leadership check on your beard
that's a good one
fine
Copernicus has been acting up
and I still think the wall
it's trying to try to kill me or something
I'll roll
I'll roll the fucking leadership
that means that the beard doesn't kill me
would you like to use glory on this
nope
there you go
I got it
I got it
okay
the beard is quelled
it's not trying to kill you
you can still take
take a psychic action and a move
like it's just
all taking multiple actions does
is just increase the difficulty
pybra
psychic communication
all of this stuff
completely out of game
pybra
would you like to be saved
pybra
I admit
you have been on my mind
you know
I used to thought we would just be friends
year old
with perfect
assaulted my mind with that bull shit
no no
you are my psychic sidekick
you know what I do to be black
miss pybrian
oh
the last there when
the web
master way
death
people aren't looking for anything
logical. Master Brain.
Oh, God.
What are you doing?
You see, when we were
on the debt connector,
Master Brain,
we saw that there was
a force of rattlings,
and there was no way
to get them out.
So we burned them alive.
I cast Flame Breath around
Pie Brain.
I love that it's a fucking race
for you assholes instead of on fire.
Oh, you see.
It is.
Master Brain, what you didn't realize
is there was an orange on the floor,
and I had to set it on fire.
It was the size of a diamond, and it was an orange.
And I ate the orange,
and I had a hypertaxia, and I died.
Wow, things are really getting
hard under the collar.
Fucking roll the goddamn dice.
I hate you.
I'm very glad.
But I'm waiting for it.
I'm waiting for it to go.
Oh, good lord.
Thank you for making twice-baked potatoes.
Let's see if it does double at this point.
I'm waiting for the thing to go.
At this point, Pie has had to deal with fire
to such an extent.
You have the shadow of Mordor
fear of fire.
I just assume the next time
you get experience, you're looking,
is there anything that makes me immune
to fire?
I'm looking for like Aqualung
level 7 trait.
It makes me immune to fire.
Fire.
Jethro level 7.
Oh, no.
Give the audience what they want.
Set him on fire.
Set him on fire like the
British Christmas goat.
I'm waiting on it.
I'm waiting.
The fire rises.
Fire rises.
Yeah, I hope you guys are really looking forward
to that ultramarine coming in next session.
Tell me about Brain.
Why does he use the sword?
Refresh the triangle.
It's like, yeah,
I guess we're going to have to do this.
I guess we're going to have to do this.
I guess we're going to have to do this.
I guess we're going to have to do this.
Let's refresh the API thing.
We'll try another quick one.
I just did.
So you'll think
about your ally.
There we go.
I got a 10.
So I want to boost all that.
So this is a medium blast.
So I assume medium blast
is basically like
it's encompassing everything, right?
You can encompass all of them.
Yes.
To answer your question.
Yes, you hit Brain.
That's all I was worried about
because if I can make a large blast.
Do you want to add
three extra damage dice to it?
Yeah.
Wait, wait.
This is a good question.
This isn't hitting me.
I just want to clarify.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Brain.
I'm trying to save you.
No way.
No way.
Now sit down.
Now sit down
while I save you.
Say the line, GM.
All right.
So roll 3d6.
No, 4d6
because of the three extra damage
you can apply to it.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Good luck.
That is 18 damage total.
Wait, no, no.
Wait, is that?
No, no, no, no, no.
The damage isn't.
Is it 14 base?
Is it?
Yeah.
That's, that's well.
Yep.
Well, you're dead now.
It is 14 plus two additional damage die
and the target is now going to be on fire.
That's double my HP.
I die.
No, you don't die.
Wait, can you,
can you reflect it in a way?
You have resilience.
No, I'm out of shock.
Can I?
Then you're just going,
you're going crazy.
Yeah.
No, no, it's, it's 10.
It's 10 because it counts as a flamer.
It's 10.
What I see.
So.
Oh, cool.
Yes.
They, they change that.
That's in the,
that time.
Okay.
I saw the old one.
You guys should have just let me do that
if that was the case.
Damage.
Say what?
What was the damage?
It should be 14 with your,
your four.
Yeah.
Okay.
It's all.
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
14 damage.
Wait, I'm also hit with this.
Yes.
Yes.
Now you can also,
you can also take a full defensive
to increase your resilience
if you would like as a reaction.
Is that,
is that resilience or defense?
In this case,
it's resilience
because it's an area of effect thing.
So you basically spend a full,
full action to like increase your defense
because you know you're going to get hit.
You're just trying to stop it.
That would be,
it would allow Pi to basically make an initiative.
I guess.
I'm doing this now.
Thanks guys for killing these ratlings.
You complicated.
You complicated.
I'm letting you know.
Yeah, thanks guys for killing these ratlings.
They were really dangerous to me.
It's a good thing that they're dead now.
I was really going to say,
like if the damage was really that high,
you should have just let me set the guy on fire.
No, no, no.
It is the comparable to you.
He just spiked.
So I take two wounds and I'm on fire again.
Just like yesterday.
All of,
all of these,
these ratlings die and their spirits go to join the,
the pyramid,
which is very close to completion.
There you go.
I always knew you could do anything.
If you set your mind to it.
I did.
I made you hot,
baby.
I'm sorry.
I'm in an incendiary mode right now.
Now I just need you to go charge that ghost in fiery fury.
Can't do that right now,
lon.
I'm run.
And Mr.
Beeb,
if you don't mind healing.
These two,
these four ratlings run.
And then I will spend the final action to have them go to the front seats
and continue watching this clusterfuck.
Clusterfuck.
Has,
has all the blood back.
Oh,
this is very,
very,
very,
very fun.
As they rush forward,
who would like to go next?
Uh,
top of the initiative order.
You can,
and pie brain was given a wrath.
Oh,
excellent.
Uh,
GM,
can I go up and,
uh,
Medicaid the fire off him?
Uh,
I mean,
yeah,
absolutely.
Okay.
I'm going to do that.
Yeah.
Ree walks up.
Hello,
pie.
How are you doing?
Well,
the Christmas,
you still act Steve.
You look,
you look inflamed.
Wait,
do I,
is the curse over?
No,
it's still active,
which is good.
You're still making terrible fun.
All right.
You look a little inflamed.
I think I should have a look at you.
Yeah.
See if I have a fever.
This is just,
this is just the,
the scene from the Simpsons where Willie got set on fire and he's just
waiting.
Yes.
Yes.
I said,
I hit the button.
I got a three and a complication.
Did I get a,
did I get a,
did I get a wrath back?
Cause I used to,
I didn't know you used to.
So if you didn't.
Oh shit.
Yeah.
Well,
Oh,
well got to clearly tell me you used to say I wanted to wrath and
reroll.
You did once,
but I didn't hear any other ones.
So if you use two,
then you used to,
I took it off.
All right.
Well,
this is good.
And you're as good as you're getting a complication.
Oh,
three.
Do I get anything?
Do I have a heart attack?
I am going,
I am going to be,
I am going to be a beneficent one.
I will allow Reeb to remove the flames from you by brain in exchange for
taking them on himself.
Oh,
fuck.
No.
Oh,
what?
Reeb,
you,
um,
um,
um,
come,
uh,
you're,
you're,
um,
I,
I,
I'm tired today.
Hey,
go and kill.
Go.
So basically,
I assume you go up to medicate him and then pie brain hugs you and the fire's all on you,
Reeb.
And then you say,
go and kill.
I appreciate your warm bedside manner.
Um,
the ghost,
uh,
moves again.
Uh,
it's Captain Zedek.
Would you like to take attack?
You're goddamn right.
I would.
You want to shoot or sword?
I'm going to sword him.
All right.
Fail.
Oh,
that's really good.
You're sort of still buzzing in anger against you.
You sure you don't want to shoot?
I don't think I'm allowed to at this point.
He'd made the declaration.
Ghosty boys moved and the ghosty boys looking at pie brain.
Hello,
pal.
Ah,
um,
oh,
soul shrivel.
I give you one chance to let get out of here.
Um,
now as a reaction,
Lauren can attempt to deny the witch.
I will attempt to deny the witch.
All right.
And it's just a psychic mastery test.
Yeah,
I have a actual dedicated.
There you go.
Uh,
I am.
I have to beat your sex,
correct?
Equal to or beat.
I think that a wrath die.
I will spend.
Yeah.
Spend a wrath die and get a eight.
Nice.
Yeah.
So he goes over to,
to you reaches out with his hands,
more fissures form.
You will fall before my legs.
Um,
but then describe Lauren,
how you stop this from happening.
No,
I'm just going to be a part of your standing ovation.
Be silent.
And I just do psychic thing.
It gets like,
I like do a smite against his thing and it clashes in the middle of a big,
big explosion and there's nothing but like ghostly claps that appear behind me going and it like disappears behind.
I'm like,
ha ha.
Well,
no,
no,
buddy.
It in there.
Good job.
Lauren,
Lauren,
Amber,
Zynga.
Okay.
Um,
oh my God.
Uh,
who would like to go next?
Hi,
you like to redeem yourself?
Uh,
I would love to go.
If I get a full defense,
but I've taken the heat for you.
Get to work.
It's the Zedek.
Yeah.
I,
I can't cause I had to full defense.
That's right.
So it's only Zedek.
All right.
Well,
I'll try and shoot him this time.
Maybe that'll actually work out.
Yeah.
All right.
Time to bust this ghost.
Take my shocking accusation of you being ugly with a six.
Oh,
so I'm sorry.
Captain Zedek.
Oh no.
I'm sorry.
I can't.
I think someone force ruined.
So someone said that did a contribution to Warhams that says,
uh,
Zedek's range attack range attack complication,
which is their own complication submitted yesterday.
You had to get a,
basically the unlikely shot was the complication name specifically.
Cause apparently they really fucking wanted this to happen the day.
So I don't know if you have that pulled up already.
You might be in there.
I can pull it up real fast here.
Yeah.
So say the unlikely shot,
if you want to do a control F and all that stuff.
And unfortunately,
I think you still crit still do all that fun stuff.
Captain Zedek,
but someone wanted you to fuck up really bad.
And they particularly targeted you.
I would say I'm shocked,
but I should come to expect this by now.
Okay.
Okay.
Roll the damage for me,
please.
Okay.
Here's the,
here's the damage.
You die.
You explode.
Nope.
Oh,
on a success.
The shot rebounds,
um,
not striking the target,
but instead striking another NPC in the room.
So you murder one of the blood back.
Cause all the other ones,
that's your arc goes off of the divine Lord straight back.
And,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and
and,
and
let's fucking hit the thing go
mind if i cut in
this bit sucks next bit i love it i love it
the curse is now lifted we were we laughed for more than five seconds there the curse is now
lifted that was in the complication but i guess
you can shift two of those he activate he activates the death lotus maneuver and destroys
okay um
zango zango yeah oh also mark me down a rune point because i tried to use a second power
sad um oh that like shears down one of his spectral legs and he turns and looks
oh no my leg um but is still still standing
listen you see through sassafras i beat you to that once get ready for the sequel
take take a reaction please do attack him as he floats away
absolutely will do it
uh that would just hit so
uh how much how much glory do we have in the tank two
that'd be two extra damage remember it's just flat damage
really i'm going to pump do you guys mind if i pump two extra damage into this then
kill him i mean two extra damage i just i'm going to pump two extra damage into this then
fucking double
yeah okay that'd be the first one so 15 in total okay cool um he's he's not looking good
but he survives and turns and raises his hands up my legs will not be undone by you
and he whooshes his hands forward as more immaterial cracks come out uh lauren would
you like to attempt to deny what i am about to do
certain thing
or not
oh yeah you stop it um more more more like crashing smiting energy
meets in the middle of the chamber and explodes in a fantastical display
yeah yeah he's um okay
can i not be home already
uh well if you denied the witch but i you wouldn't have actually denied the witch because he missed so
you can molten beam him now
all right let's do it can i go does anyone else want to do a thing
i'm good i'm waiting
all right go lord go go go lord go go i got a seven go go is that enough no no
that's that's that's enough to hit it you can't shift anything
two damage go go 18 go go
wait there's no dice with that
uh that's that's it that's all i got oh okay oh yeah okay
this isn't painting
he knows what he's doing
clearly
uh oh
he needs you
that's a good idea
you might get me another rune point
uh
please mark me down one more rune point and we'll see if i can determination this to have
him
let's see
oh
after our deny the witch exchange,
an explosion happens, and I'm like,
your death will be legendary!
Whoop!
And then I basically molten beam straight through him,
do a carve around and, like, cut off his ghostly legs,
and just, and then watch his ghostly form
begin to dissipate and fall down.
His legs first, just right onto the ground.
And he disappears.
And suddenly everything lurches forward,
and you all kind of have, like, this moment
where you almost stumble.
Reeb, the flames on you go out
with the destruction of this being
as the tower of spectral rattlings
all tumbles to the ground
and then disappears as well.
And you just all feel the sudden shaking of the ship.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh, I think this tank's might,
might, might giving full, fairly strewn
with the crumbling of the air.
We gotta get out of here, boys!
Everyone, use your legs!
Okay, we're coming, let's go, let's go!
And you all begin rushing out of here
as, as behind you, there's the sounds of cracking
and then bursting as the marble floor
of this would-be church breaks apart,
septic sewage coming up to consume everything.
Uh-oh.
And then you make it to the end of the hall, escaping.
And then you find yourselves in a room
with the, the, all of the blood-backed sort of breathing,
ooh, ooh, that was, that was, uh,
that was a mighty something there, oh.
Oh, there it is.
And, and Zedek, as you breathe
and your, your weapon has stopped vibrating in your hand,
you just hear,
Captain, Captain, Cap-Captain.
Uh, R-Ransom, yes, I can hear you.
Can you hear me?
Captain!
Uh, the warp storm, it, it seems to have abated.
Uh, finally, we, all hell broke loose
and though we rode the eye of the storm,
we made it through.
Now, there is one last, two last things we must do.
One, we must begin
a preparation.
A preparation.
Two missions to retrieve Datatort.
But two,
I look at Reem.
Where is the other femur?
May I ask why you need my femur for that?
I will tell you.
I don't expect you to understand.
That man was a menace.
He deserved to be killed
and he sold himself out
to the dark powers
of the dark gods.
But,
which means very bad things.
But,
he takes a very particular kind of adversary
to return after killed.
He was one with the motive force.
And at the very least,
as a sign of respect for our fallen adversary,
we must admit he had rather nice legs.
Well, yes, that's why I've put it on display.
What did you do with yours?
Hmm.
And it's a flashback to Pai who,
while just sort of generally doing maintenance on servitors,
would occasionally just hit them with the bone
when he got frustrated to channel his negative feelings
towards Gamu whenever Gamu would just like passive aggressively
do things and many images of Pai smashing shit
on the dead collector after Gamu incensed him,
you know, with this golden femur bone,
like cram like,
oh, they don't think I'm going to fix this.
I'm going to fix this.
I'm good as new.
And, and I think where we're going to end today's episode
is all of you walking away from this ship now,
calmly sailing through the war.
And as you as you all walk away,
we pass by one servitor that's in the halls very briefly,
like we cut to that flashback of Pai Brain hitting various servitors
with the femur in rage.
We cut to one servitor that's in the hall.
Compliance as it receives orders.
And my legs.
And that's where we'll end.
Oh,
John.
Oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh,
oh.
thing
for
you.
That's
a
lot
of
good
excitement.
It was
just
very
much
fun.
Looking
forward
to
all
of
you
watching
us
here.
All
that's
warm shout-out to our wonderful
community.
And on Chris Toyo Acolyte,
Reeve Van Horn, played by Aaron Dill.
Yeah, you can meet me
on Twitter, and by meet me, I mean
watch me reblog or retweet
crap that's just, you know,
installed kind of all over the place, whether it's in support
of something or just, you know, farting
out of my ass, then, you know, you can follow me on
that. And again, I appreciate
you all being patient for the issues
that Speaker was facing.
They were a little bit more than technical.
And I
am Sean the Bear. I've been playing as
Lorne, the Sanctioned Psycho,
and Captain
Zedek, owner of the Debt Collector,
writer of Zedekit,
played by Hulky Crow.
Yes, it is
indeed me, Hulky Crow.
You can find me on Twitter
at Hulky Crow. It's really the only
active social I have at the moment, or
pester me on Zoran's Discord server if I'm there
every now and then. I, again,
thank you, everybody, for the
wonderful cheers and jeers.
And the presenter of
Legs, the ruiner of
happiness, the one who
sets players on fire, our
gangmaster, Thurston Hillman.
Hello!
Thank you all for enjoying this
Halloween special that was entire.
That was totally not the result of me
going, what am I going to do for a Halloween special?
It'll just be an episode of
ghosts and my
legs, and then I realized what I would do.
But seriously, thank you, everyone,
we'll be getting back to some more
continuity arc
stuff in the next session.
Yeah, yeah. Get ready
for a pretty
nutso next arc.
And
with that, thank you everyone so much
for watching. Hope you all have a lovely day today.
We'll see you next time,
same bat time, same bat channel, every
other Saturday.
Be sure to check on Twitter for our current
schedule. It's our first pinned tweet.
I was trying to keep it that way. Thank you all
so much for chilling with us. Hope you have a
good one. Please be safe.
And we will see you next
time.
Whoa!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!